The Perished Parent
by Madame Naberrie
Summary: Violet, Klaus, and Sunny Baudelaire discover a woman named Beatrice, a man named Lemony, a survivor that was presumed dead, and much more along the way! REVISED!
1. Unexpected Surprises

Chapter One: Unexpected Surprises

My name is Lisle Pendella, and I was at one point married to Jacques Snicket. Lemony Snicket, due to an unpleasant incident involving a train, was unable to continue his tales of the Baudelaire orphans, so he asked me if I could carry out this task. I at first was not up to such a task, but when a mysterious man wearing a red fez asked me what my favorite type of cheese was, I decided it would be best to do what my brother-in-law requested of me.

If you have ever ridden in a taxicab, then you know that it is not a very pleasant experience. Sometimes, the interior smells of coffee, or in the case of the cabs of Lousy Lane, like horseradish. The most unpleasant thing, though, is the uncomfortable conversations between you and the driver. You do not want to talk, afraid that you might say something that he or she couldn't care less for, and make their experience unpleasant, as well as your own. The driver might say something to you about his children, or his elderly grandmother, and you would reply, "That's nice," or "That's interesting," but none of this would be of any significance to you, but it would be rude to tell he or she so. So, you must sit in the back and travel passively, a phrase which here means, "Listen to a driver talk about something very tedious, and do nothing about it." This is often a very tiresome way to travel, so most people take their own cars. But when you are a young child without any parents, it is difficult to do so. You are forced to take a taxicab and travel passively.

Had this been any other occasion, Violet, Klaus, and Sunny Baudelaire would have been in this situation. But this time, the driver was far too interesting to ignore, and the things she was saying were far too significant to merely let them go in one ear and out the other. This driver had the answers to the questions that had surrounded them since the mysterious fire that destroyed their home and killed their parents. The orphans did not feel like shutting out what she had to say or replying, "That's nice." The driver was someone they wanted to listen to: a woman by the name of Kit Snicket.

"Kit," Violet began. "Are you Jacques Snicket's sister?" Violet had recently turned fifteen, and was already the finest inventor the world had ever known. Anyone who knew Violet well could tell she was thinking up and invention when her hair was tied up in a black ribbon.

"I am indeed. As well as the sister of-" Kit said.

"Please Kit," Klaus interrupted, "Tell us everything you know about VFD," the middle Baudelaire said. He was thirteen, but already a most talented and perceptive researcher.

"Tell def," Sunny, the youngest of the children said. Sunny was still developing her vocabulary having just recently become a young girl instead of a baby. 'Tell def' meant, "Yes Kit, please tell us what this means, as well as the other secrets we've managed to learn since our parents died."

Kit smiled. "Everything will be revealed to you in time. You must wait, Baudelaires."

The three children glanced at each other. They did not want to wait. The Baudelaires had been waiting since the day they discovered VFD. They had come close to knowing these answers several times, but, each time, the secrets had been snatched away from their enemy, Count Olaf, like a greedy child snatching away cookies.

Kit started the car and put it in drive. As they drove away from Briny Beach, they could see Mr. Poe, the Vice President in Charge of Orphan Affairs, waving his arms madly at the car.

"Should I stop for him?" Kit asked the orphans.

"No," Violet said firmly. "He thinks we're responsible for a numerous amount of crimes published in-"

"The Daily Punctilio; I know," Kit finished.

"That newspaper doesn't always tell the truth," Klaus said carefully.

"I know you're innocent, Baudelaires, you needn't worry," Kit reassured them. "Lets have a quiet drive and we can talk when we get to Hotel Denouement," she said.

"The last safe place! Kit, do you belong to VFD?" Violet asked.

"Shh. All will be revealed," she said.

The children sat in silence for a long time when Violet noticed that her brother was staring glumly out the window.

"Klaus, what's wrong?" she whispered.

"I can't believe she betrayed us," he said.

Violet thought for a moment and realized he was talking about Fiona. Klaus and Fiona had been very fond of each other, and at the last minute she sided with Olaf, saying goodbye only with a kiss.

Violet put her arm around her brother. "It's all right, Klaus. She had to be with her family. She has no one. We have each other, but not her. She had no one," Violet whispered.

"She had me," he argued.

"She loved you very much Klaus, but this was something she had to do. I know you'll miss her. It's all right," she comforted her brother.

Violet hugged her brother tightly. Sunny, who had been asleep in his lap, woke up.

"Sorry Sunny," Violet said.

"Okay. You keep talk," she said and fell back asleep. The older Baudelaires looked at their little sister and smiled. It seemed only yesterday that she was a little baby, and now she was a young girl with unusually sharp teeth who had found a recent talent for cooking. Then, suddenly, a new thought dawned on them, and they shuddered as they remembered her near-death experience. She had been poisoned by some very deadly mushrooms, but Sunny discovered an antidote just in the knick of time, a phrase which here means, "Discovered that pouring a hot Japanese spice called wasabi down her throat would cure her just before the mushroom spores growing inside her completely blocked her throat, making it impossible to breathe."

"You miss Quigley, don't you Violet?" Klaus inquired.

Violet nodded. "He was a good friend," she said quietly.

"He _is _a good friend. He's still alive," Klaus said, even though he knew no such thing. When the Baudelaires went to boarding school, they met a pair of triplets, Duncan and Isadora Quagmire, who mistakenly thought their other brother, Quigley, was dead. Olaf pursued Duncan and Isadora for their fortune as well, but they escaped in a self-sustaining hot air balloon with a man named Hector. The children later met Quigley, but he was rushed away in the icy cold waters of the Stricken Stream. The Baudelaires later on discovered he managed to escape, and he sent them a telegram. That was the last they heard of him.

"You're right Klaus. There's no reason for me to be dismal," Violet said with courage.

"So much for the silence," Kit joked.

The siblings had been so wrapped up in conversation that they had completely forgotten about the person driving the automobile.

For the remainder of the trip, which lasted several more hours, the children slept. It seemed as though they had not a moments rest since that day at the beach, so sleep came easily and much appreciated.

When the Baudelaire sisters finally woke up, they saw two kind faces looking at them. They sat up groggily and wondered where they were. Vague memories of being led into a hotel came to mind.

"Welcome, Baudelaires," said a man with a long beard.

"Where are we?" Violet asked. "Are we at the hotel yet?"

"Yes," replied a woman with a red dress. "Don't you remember? Probably not, it was late last night," she said half to herself.

"Kapisha?" asked Sunny, which meant, "Where has Kit Snicket gone?" She looked around, but she was nowhere in sight. "Kapisho?" she asked, which meant, "Where is our brother? Is he all right?"

Violet translated as best she could after just waking up.

"Kit left. Her mission was to take you here, and she did just that. Klaus is in the other room. Would you like to see him?" the man asked.

The girls nodded and followed the man down several long and cold corridors with ugly carpets until they came to room 667. The man knocked, and a familiar voice that didn't belong to Klaus called out.

"Yes?" the voice said.

"The world is quiet here," said the man with the beard. Violet immediately recognized this as the password for VFD she had heard many times throughout various places.

The door opened to reveal a short chubby man with a red nose and a mustache that turned up at the ends. Violet thought for a moment that she had seen him before, put ignored the thought. "Hello!" he boomed. "Come on in! Don't stand there in the cold! These halls get drafty! Come on!" he said ushering the girls in.

Sunny walked over to her brother, who had just woken up and was sitting on the bed. She hugged his legs; after all, she wasn't tall enough to reach up higher. It seemed like a long time since they had seen him.

"Hello Sunny," he said and picked her up.

"Hello there, Baudelaires! I haven't seen you in a long time! Wait! Yes, I have! Two days ago! Aye!" the familiar man said.

All the Baudelaires turned in the direction of this voice, and found in amazement that one of these men was a recent comrade of theirs.

"Widdershins?" Sunny asked in amazement.

"Captain Widdershins!" Violet exclaimed. Captain Widdershins was Fiona's stepfather. Violet knew it was he from the extra 'aye' he added into his statement. The captain used this word a lot, being on the sea; it was a word used by pirates. He used it just as my brother used it as a code when he found the sugar bowl. "How-? When-" Violet began, but she was too shocked.

Suddenly, Klaus recognized the man standing in front of him. "You," Klaus said angrily. His sisters looked at him quizzically. "You," he said again.

"What's wrong with you boy? Cat got your tongue? Aye! He who hesitates is lost! Or she! Say it boy! Aye!" the captain said nervously, stating his personal philosophy. He began to twiddle his thumbs, sensing that something was wrong.

Klaus put Sunny down and moved towards the man. "You abandoned Fiona," he said quietly. "You left her alone. She joined Olaf because of you! She's gone because of you!" He cried. He staggered backward and sat down on the bed, hands covering his face, shaking with sobs. Normally, it is very rude to speak to people in such a manner, but Klaus did not care about his manners. He only cared about Fiona, for the moment, although very soon, he would end up not caring about her at all.

"Klaus!" Violet scolded.

For once in his life, the Captain was silent. "I didn't mean her harm," he said finally. The captain headed for the door and gestured for the bearded man to follow as well. The Baudelaires were alone.

I cannot describe to you the misery that the middle Baudelaire felt at this moment. Nor can I describe to you how sad his sisters felt for him.

"If Captain Widdershins hadn't left, she could be here right now. With me," he said miserably between the sobs.

"Oh, Klaus," Violet said, her eyes becoming misty as she sat down next to her brother and hugged him tightly. She knew how horrible that felt; to lose someone very dear to you. She lost Quigley. In fact, they all knew. They had lost their parents. All three Baudelaires huddled together, crying for all the people and things they had lost. As they wept, it seemed as though their series of unfortunate events would never end.

The littlest Baudelaire stiffened resolutely. "No more cry. We here now. Find answers. Defeat Olaf. Kapish?" Sunny said. 'kapish' was Sunny's way of saying 'understand', and they Baudelaires did kapish. They knew what they had to do.

"Sunny's right, Violet," Klaus said firmly. "We have been trying to get here ever since Sunny overheard the location of the last safe place. And now, we're here." He grinned. "Let's get going."

The Baudelaires got going. They dressed and made their way back to Violet's room, where the lady in the red dress was patiently waiting.

"Baudelaires?" She looked surprised, as if she hadn't expected them to come. She recovered herself and motioned for them to follow. They winded down the drafty corridors for a long time. As they passed the laundry room, Violet saw two things most people wouldn't have noticed, although extremely important. This wasn't the last time the Baudelaires would see these two things, particularly Klaus, but it wouldn't be for a long time. The whole trip, she racked her brain, thinking very hard. Her siblings noticed, but decided to leave her alone. They finally reached a door marked 'BALLROOM'. And just as they were slipping in, Violet whispered to her siblings.

"Fiona is here. And she has the sugar bowl."

"Fiona?" Klaus asked, his eyes wide.

"I'll tell you soon. Now is not the time. Trust me."

They walked into the room to see about twenty chairs, and there were three empty chairs. In the middle chair was a woman with dark black hair, darker than a pitch-black panther eating black liquorice at midnight in the very deepest part of the Black Sea. Her eyes were a magnificent green, her skin was light. She rose as the Baudelaires entered the room, and they could see she was at least six feet tall.

"Baudelaires," she said with a voice that sounded like bells ringing. "My name is Beatrice, and I know where your mother is." The children gasped as each mystery slowly started unraveling around them, and for once, it seemed like their series of unfortunate events had come to an end.


	2. Fiona

Chapter Two: Fiona

"Our mother?" Violet managed. She felt like she couldn't breathe. She would have toppled over if Klaus hadn't steadied her with his hand.

The three children stood, not believing their ears. After all they had been through, after everything, the whole time, their mother had been alive. Why hadn't she been looking for them? Why hadn't she tried to contact them? Why had they not known? Questions flooded the children's heads, all of them tripping over one another. Tears came to the children's eyes, and suddenly, everything seemed all right. For the moment, they felt safe. They knew that they had to see their mother.

"Where is she?" Klaus asked eagerly.

"Classified information, children," Beatrice said with a shake of her head.

"Surely you can tell us where our mother is!" Violet cried in frustration.

"I cannot," Beatrice said.

"Please," Violet pleaded as tears ran down her cheeks.

"No," Beatrice said firmly. "I cannot."

The children started crying silently. They wanted—needed—so badly to know where their mother was.

"Sit, please, and we'll tell you more. Next to Captain Widdershins," she urged. Violet sighed, and knew it was no use arguing. She wasn't going to tell them, it was plain. Violet knew that her brother did not want to be near this man, so she sat next to him instead.

"We are VFD: volunteer fire department. There were many people working for this organization once, a long time ago. But there was a schism among us. Some chose good, and some chose evil. We," she said and gestured to all the members, "Are the only people who work for good." She admitted sadly.

"Beatrice," Klaus began. "Is that a spyglass?"

She smiled and took out a gold piece of metal. A spyglass is a device that enables you too see things far away, but only with one eye. If you watch pirate movies (and I hope you don't; they're a bad influence) you have probably seen the captain holding this up to his eye and crying, "Land ho!" or maybe "Sugar bowl!"

"All of us have one," she said.

"Then, was our father a member?" he asked slowly.

"Deepo, Klaus?" Sunny asked, which probably meant, "Where on earth did you get that notion in your head, Klaus?"

He reached his hand in his pocket and slowly took the gold spyglass out. Violet eye's widened.

"Where did you get that?" she asked.

"I found it in my father's desk," he told them. "I didn't tell anyone else because it didn't seem important. But then when we went to live with Aunt Josephine-"

"Josephine Answhistle?" somebody asked.

"Yes," he said. "Any way-"

"Is she alive?" the person asked.

The Baudelaires glanced at each other. VFD knew so much about them, but they knew nothing of something that was all over the news? How to say it?

"Josephine has passed away," Violet said finally.

"How did she die?"

The children again were stuck. It was quite gruesome, really, her fate. How would they tell them?

"The Lachrymose Leeches got her before we did," Klaus said glumly, and he didn't have to say anymore. Everyone knew how dangerous Lachrymose Leeches were, almost like piranhas. They can eat you up in three minutes flat. They sat there for a moment, considering the sadness of this event. Aunt Josephine was not a very good guardian, but she was the sweetest person they had known.

"All right, Klaus, what were you saying about the spyglass?" Beatrice said.

"I saw a picture of Josephine, my parents, and some people I didn't know. They all had spyglasses," Klaus informed her.

"Yes, Klaus. Josephine, your parents, and the Snickets were all members of VFD. Even Olaf was too, but he chose evil. I always suspected him," she told the shocked orphans.

"Beatrice," said Violet. "I think I know where the sugar bowl is," Violet said as all eyes turned to her.

"How? Where is it?" she said instinctively. "Wait, no, there could be spies everywhere," she said. "I call this gathering to an end," she said. "Baudelaires," she whispered. "Come with me."

She led the way out of the ballroom and into the hallways. They walked to room 112 and went inside. Beatrice pulled a lever near the door and suddenly, a small door in the wall opened up to reveal a table with a blue tablecloth.

"Baudelaires," she began. "You have met Madame Lulu, have you not?" They nodded. "Good. This was recovered from the fire that burned down Caligri Carnival." She turned the tablecloth upside down. It was completely covered in scraps of paper from newspaper, magazines, and other assorted books and brochures.

"Her archival library!" Violet gasped. Suddenly, the Baudelaires felt a pang of guilt. They had started that fire with Count Olaf. They had to, to save themselves, so that Olaf wouldn't see through their disguises. But, he did anyway.

"Yes. Kit recovered it," Beatrice. "Violet come here. Klaus, I'm sorry, but you must leave the room for your own safety," she said and whisked the middle Baudelaire out into the hallway.

Klaus stood there for a moment, unsure of what to do. But then he saw a young girl dressed in a black gown with a white apron. Her brown hair was tied tightly in a knot, and she was carrying a tray with two teacups on it. Her eyes were bold, bright blue, and her skin was vanilla. She looked at Klaus, and dropped the tray on the ground, shattering the cups. She stood there mouth open, just staring at him. He stood there, mouth open, just staring at her.

"Klaus Baudelaire?" she asked.

"Fiona?" he said. They stood there for a moment, unsure of what to do. Fiona ran up to Klaus and embraced him, and he hugged her back.

"I never thought I'd see you again, Fiona," he said.

Fiona's eyes filled with tears. "I don't know why I did it," she said.

"Did what, Fiona?" Klaus asked.

"Join him. Join Count Olaf. I regret it, Klaus. I betrayed you."

"No. I understand. I do."

"I quit Count Olaf's troupe and came to work here. I felt so bad. But he swore he'd come after me," she said, still embracing Klaus.

"I won't let anything happen to you," he said firmly and looked straight at her. "I missed you," he whispered.

"I missed you," she whispered back.

At that moment, they saw something that made them shudder. Standing right there, was Count Olaf. And at them, he was pointing a gun.

"Well, hello there, orphan. And little Fiona. Ho ho ho hee hee hee snigglebrat!" Count Olaf giggled.

Klaus took Fiona's hand and moved her behind him, shielding her from Count Olaf. "Why are you here?" he demanded.

"To get the sugar bowl, of course. Why else would I be here?" he smirked.

Klaus felt a hand on his shoulder, and it pushed him aside. Count Olaf grabbed Fiona and covered her mouth.

"Tie her up, Kevin," he said referring to an ambidextrous person previously employed at Caligri Carnival. Kevin tied her hands tightly with a rope he had in his equally strong hands.

"No! Untie her!" Klaus cried and frantically tugged at the ropes. Count Olaf merely smiled, an evil and villainous smile, and darted down the hall. Klaus tried to follow, but he was held back by another one of Olaf's associates. He turned around to see Hugo the hunchback dragging him down the hall. Klaus squirmed around, but the man held on fast. He was trapped.

"Fiona!" he exclaimed.

Fiona managed to break free long enough to scream, "Klaus!"

"Fiona!" Klaus screamed again. "Not again!" he said and elbowed the Hugo as hard as he could in the stomach. Hugo immediately let go, and Klaus sprinted as fast as he could down the hall. But just as he was gaining on Count Olaf, another of Olaf's associates stepped in his path, blocking his way, Colette the contortionist. Klaus tried to push the woman aside, but she held her ground, a phrase which here means, "did not budge one inch to let Klaus rescue his friend." She seized him and carried him down the hallway and into an elevator, but no matter how hard he tried, she would not let go. The elevator went up and up, until finally, it reached the top floor. She shoved him into room 754 and forced him to sit on a green chair. She tied him up with ropes and covered his mouth.

"That ought to hold you," she said, and locked the door.

Meanwhile, Violet Baudelaire was sitting with Beatrice, studying the archival library.

"Violet, I'm sure you're wondering who I am, aren't you?" Beatrice said with a smile.

"I am a bit curious," Violet said.

"I was a friend of your parents. I knew you when you were just a little baby. Why, I even taught you how to sit up. When I heard of the fire, I was devastated. I at once wanted to adopt you, but I couldn't. Mr. Poe was convinced that only a blood relative could adopt you."

"But, that's what our parents wanted, isn't it?" Violet asked.

"What? No! Why on earth would you think that? They willed you children to me," Beatrice said.

"Then, why did everyone say we had to be with a relative?" Violet asked.

"I don't know. Someone must have written a fake will, because that wasn't true."

"Olaf," the Baudelaire sisters said in unison.

"He wanted our fortune, so he set the house on fire, wrote the will, and took us in! I should have known." Violet said.

"Oh my! I tried many times to adopt you, but Mr. Poe wouldn't allow it. But then, one day, I was sitting in my office when in came your mother, explaining her story. I immediately sent her into to hiding for her own safety, and since them, I've been trying to contact you. I know my children spoke to you, but-"

"Your children?" Violet asked.

"Yes! Quigley, Duncan, and Isadora! Don't you know? I'm Beatrice Quagmire!" said Beatrice, and Violet and Sunny gasped.

"You're dead!" Violet stammered.

"Perished!" Sunny cried.

"No," she smiled. "I guess I should tell you my story." She fidgeted in her seat briefly, and the Baudelaire sisters got comfortable. "I was, before the fire, engaged to a man named Lemony Snicket, Jacques and Kit Snicket's brother. I could not, for various reasons, marry him, so I wrote a two hundred-page book to him explaining why I could not. I married another man, James Quagmire, the founder of the Quagmire Sapphires, and had three children. Merely months after the fire that destroyed your home, mine too was set ablaze. I sent my son, Quigley, under a secret passageway to save him, but I couldn't find Duncan and Isadora, and my husband had been trapped under a bookcase, and was undoubtedly already dead," Beatrice said, wiping tears from her eyes. "I searched as long as I could, but I couldn't find them. I knew I had to get out, so I ran to the passageway, but something had fallen on top, and it wouldn't budge. I escape out the front window, and saw the police and fire department there. I tried to ask them where my children had gone, but nobody would answer me. I assumed the worst. Nevertheless, I searched everywhere, and it was there that I saw Count Olaf, disguised as a detective. I knew at once that I was in grave danger, so I left. I ran away, and changed my name to Amanda Connolly. I received a job as a manager at the In Boutique, and secretly worked for VFD. I tried to find my children. Somehow, I managed to contact Jacques, and told him about what had happened. He set out to find the triplets, but could only find Quigley. I tried to talk to him, but Jacques was gone. I later learned that he was burned at the stake in VFD. I knew that you were living there at the time, but I had no way to get a hold of you. I went to the headquarters in the Valley of Four Drafts, but when I arrived, it was burned down. I went to Hotel Denouement after receiving the coded message, and I found you," Beatrice said.

"The message was addressed to JS. We thought that meant Jacques Snicket, but he was dead by then. Who was it for?" Violet asked, biting her nails.

"Jeanine Smith. Do you know who she is?" Beatrice asked.

"No, I don't… wait a second!" Violet said and snapped her fingers. "My mother's name is Jeanine! But her last name is Baudelaire!" Violet cried.

"Her maiden name was Smith. She never told you? The volunteer who tossed the sugar bowl out the window sent the message to her. His name was Victor Fred Dowry, but he died in the fire," Beatrice said.

"Tommy tu pado," said Sunny who had been silently playing on the floor. She meant something along the lines of, "Did you hear that sound coming from the hallway?"

"No, Sunny, I didn't," Violet said after translating. She stood up from the table and walked to the door of the hotel room. Pressing her ear against it, she listened closely. She heard a voice she couldn't recognize, and it was saying her brother's name.

"Klaus!" she heard, and flung open the door, but nothing was there, including her brother.

"Klaus!" she called out, but heard no reply. "Beatrice, my brother's gone!" Violet called back.

Sunny walked towards her sister, and into the hallway. "Klaus?" she called. Violet picked Sunny up as Sunny began to cry, her little fists rubbing her eyes. They had been separated too many times.

"It's okay, Sunny," Violet said, rubbing her sister's back. "I'm sure Klaus is fine," she said, even though she knew no such thing. "It's okay," she said soothingly.

Beatrice came from behind them and patted Violet's shoulder. "We'll find him," Beatrice said, and pointed to the elevator. "You two go upstairs, and I'll look down here," she said, and started down the hallway.

Violet walked to the elevator and pressed the up button, remembering when they had been living on 667 Dark Avenue with Esme Squalor, and they had to climb down the dark and dank elevator shaft by themselves. Ever since, elevators had made the children a bit skittish. But, they would do anything to save their brother. The elevator doors slid open, and the Baudelaires stepped inside.

"We'll start at the top, so it will be easier to keep track of the floors we've already been to," Violet said as the elevator went up.

"OK, Violet," Sunny said, and stopped crying. No matter how dire their predicament was, Sunny trusted her older sister completely, and was willing to take a risk again.

"Quagmire mom! How she get here?" Sunny said.

"I know, I'm as shocked as you are. I mean, how unlikely is that: meeting Quigley's mom here. Amazing," Violet said, shaking her head at the absurdity of it.

"Lemony Snicket," Sunny said.

"I never heard of him. I wonder if he knows who we are too?" Violet asked as the elevator reached the top floor. Violet stepped out of the metal doors, and was surprised to see that it was very dark. The only light came from one lonely flickering light bulb on the ceiling. Although Sunny was a young girl and no longer a baby, the dark made her a little frightened, and she reached up for her big sister to hold her. I must confess, if I had been there, I too would have wanted someone to hold me, for the darkness was quite eerie. Violet scooped up her little sister in her arms and walked slowly towards the first door. Pressing her finger to her lips as a sign for Sunny to be quiet, she listened closely, but she only heard the sound of a woman singing opera. She shook her head to her sister and tiptoed to the next door. Inside, Violet heard the sound of laughter. Evil, villainous, laughter, that she immediately recognized as the laughter of Esme Gigi Genevieve Squalor, the evil girlfriend of Count Olaf. Count Olaf was here. How did he find them every single time? She was distraught. Covering her mouth so her gasp would not be heard, she rushed to a door marked supply closet, went inside, and shut the door. She heard the villain coming out of the hotel room. Odd, tottering steps walked down the hallway, accompanied by other footsteps undoubtedly belonging to the other members of Olaf's troupe. The sisters realized with horror that Esme was wearing her stiletto heals.

Usually, the term, "stiletto heals" means a type of women's shoes that have a very long heal. But in this case, the term "stiletto heals" means "shoes with heals made of actual stilettos, which are small knives that resemble a dagger," which is much worse than the more frequent meaning.

The Baudelaires waited until they could no longer hear the sound of Esme's heals before quietly emerging from their hiding place in the closet. Stepping cautiously outside, Violet tiptoed to the door. She could hear nothing. Taking a deep breath, she thought what might happen if she went through that door. She decided to risk it. After all, Klaus might be there. She opened the door and stepped inside, shutting it quietly behind her. She could see one window at the far end, covered in dusty blinds. The window was open, and the blinds shook up and down. But it was not the window that made her gasp. It was the desk.

The desk was dark brown and burnt. The wood had been chipped off, and she could see two faint letters had been carved into the front. The initials were CB. She knew at once whom this desk had belonged to. It was her father's, Christopher Baudelaire. She put Sunny down and walked slowly towards it. She pulled on the delicate handle, trying not to break the drawer. Inside was everything her father had treasured dearly. His pictures of the family, of Violet as a little girl, her mother, Klaus and Sunny as babies. His favorite pen, his papers. She shuffled through charred scraps of papers, until she came across a picture frame. In it, was a picture of Violet as a baby. Next to Violet was a small baby, skinny and pale. She read her father's scrawled handwriting at the bottom, and could scarcely believe the words she saw. On the bottom of the picture, it said this: Our little twins, Violet and Veronica Baudelaire. Violet stared hard, and knew at once what it meant. She wiped tears from her eyes as she recalled one day in the library with her family. The Baudelaires had been searching for a book to help Violet with a paper for school. She had found this picture, but had not enough time to read it. Her mother had quickly whisked it away, reassuring Violet it was nothing. The parents had exchanged sad looks, and the children had been quickly dismissed to their rooms. She'd had a twin. A sister.


	3. The Fourth Baudelaire

Chapter Three: The Fourth Baudelaire

Veronica must have died, though Violet couldn't imagine why her parents hadn't told her. She dropped the picture, shattering it into a million tiny pieces. She felt her knees give out as she sat on the floor, tears inching down her face. She felt miserable.

"How could they do this to me?" she cried. "They didn't tell me! How could they!" she said, pounding her fist into the wall. For the first time since her parent's death, she felt angry with them. They had kept this secret from her, as well as VFD. They had died and left them with nothing, no plan it had seemed.

"It's not fair!" she said to Sunny. "It's not fair!" she said again, but immediately regretted it. She knew of course, that it was not her parents' fault that they had died. They had their reasons for keeping their secrets of course, though Violet could not see why. She thought she had known her parents, but it was like they were completely different people, with completely different lives. Violet took Sunny in her arms, and told her all about Veronica. They felt utterly alone. They just wanted to go back. To go back to that day at the Briny Beach, and save their parents. But they couldn't go back. Now, more than ever, they wanted so badly to change time.

Violet stood up and walked to the window and opened the blinds. She could see that they were in a city that was very familiar. It was the city that Violet had grown up in, the city she used to live in. The view was also familiar, and quite lovely. She saw the penthouse on 667 Dark Avenue, and the ruins of Uncle Monty's house, and when Violet looked a little further, she could see her own. The burned down house lied there, asleep in the ashes. She wiped a tear from her eye as the sun began to set, turning the sky pink and red. She looked up, and for the first time, she felt hope. She remembered something her parents had said, in the letter that never came.

At times, the world may seem like an unfriendly and sinister place. But believe us when we say that there is much more good in it than bad, and what might seem to be a series of unfortunate events may in fact be the first steps of a journey. Know this: as long as you three have each other, you have your family, and that is enough to get you through any unfortunate situation.

Violet realized this was true, and a smile crept on her face as she remembered something else she had heard a long time ago.

_There is some good in this world, Violet, and its worth fighting for._

Violet pushed the window open further, and looked upon the world. She looked upon the sun, and saw everything that was good. That kindness, and compassion, and everything all the good people in this world believe to be good, were right there with her. Evil would not triumph, not while there was still some good in this world. She knew, that no matter where they were, her parents were happy, and that was enough to make her happy too.

-:-

Klaus struggled with his ropes as he tried to get free. He pulled and twisted, but they were too tight. Closing his eyes, he tried to remember everything he had read about tying knots. Thinking hard, he finally remembered one book he had read when he was about eight. He remembered the Devil's Tongue, a knot Violet had used many times with her inventions. He thought hard, biting his lip. He was about six when Violet had been working on her latest invention. He had watched carefully as Violet had tied knots around and around, and he had even taken notes for further reference. Those notes were destroyed in the fire that had killed their parents, of course, but he wished he had them now. He reached with his fingers and found he could touch the knot above his hands. He felt the knots in his hands, tried to figure out what knot it was. He followed the rope with his hands, and smiled as he realized how lucky he was. The knot was the Devil's Tongue.

He struggled franticly to untie them, when finally, he found the end, and pulled as hard as he could. The knot started unraveling, and soon, the ropes were lying about him in a bundled heap. He reached up to his mouth and pulled the cloth that was covering it, coughing as he did.

His first instinct was to run to the door, but it was locked. He shook the handle, but it wouldn't budge. He took a quick glance at his surroundings. Nothing much, really. An umbrella, a pile of rocks, and a large bundle of blankets lay scattered across the room. The room had obviously not been slept in for years, because there was nothing in there. He thought of inventing a lock pick, like Violet had when they were living with Uncle Monty, but there was nothing to make a lock pick with. He thought hard, waiting for something to come to him. He racked his brain for an idea, but could not think of one. "What would Violet do?" he thought to himself. "Violet would invent something out of these materials. But what can you make out of an umbrella, a pile of rocks, and some blankets?" he thought.

When he saw the window at the far end of the room, something came to him. "That's it!" he thought to himself. He crossed over to the window and ripped the dusty blinds off. He could see that he was about seven floors up, much to far to jump. He looked at the blankets, and estimated he had about thirty of them. He wondered if they could hold up his weight. Klaus grabbed the biggest, heaviest rock he could find, and went to the door. Facing the window, and throwing as hard as he could, he hurled the rock at the window, and his idea worked perfectly. The glass shattered into a million pieces, and went tumbling to the ground. The wind blew through the new hole in the window, making him shiver in the cold. Klaus worked carefully tying the blankets together to create an ersatz rope. He tied the ersatz rope to the doorknob in the hotel room, and grabbing the umbrella, carefully lowered himself over the side of the window. The sun was setting, and he realized he might be climbing through the night.

"Don't look down," he thought to himself as he climbed down. This is another slow form of traveling, not to mention extremely dangerous. One misplacement of his hands, and he would tumble to his doom. He climbed very slowly, so the whole trip took a very long time.

It is not necessary to tell you about his tedious and perilous journey down the ersatz rope, nor is it necessary for you to go on reading this book. You should stare at something more pleasant, like your homework, if you prefer that sort of thing. It is my duty to write down these sad tales, but you have not sworn yourself to such things, so you might as well put this book down right now and spare yourself an evening of bitter sobbing. If I were you, I would not even have picked up this book, but alas, I am not you, and there is no way I could have warned you before you took this book off the dusty shelf in the oldest, least frequently visited section of the library or bookstore. I wish that I did not have to publish or sell this book, but under desperate cheese related circumstances, I promised I would, a choice that has forever changed my life. So, as Klaus climbs down his makeshift rope, I suggest you do something better with your time, like dig a pit deep enough to hold a certain unfortunate and miserable book.

Klaus felt his shoes land on something as he realized he had reached the bottom of his rope. He was now standing on brown dirt in the back of the hotel. The sun had already set, so it was dark outside. He saw that he was by a road, and every so often, a car would creep across the black ribbon on the ground. The ribbon reminded him of his sisters, and he immediately remembered the task at hand. Klaus pulled as hard as he could on the rope until it came untied from the doorknob and coiled at his feet. He wound up the rope and retrieved the umbrella hanging on his belt. He ripped the top of the umbrella off so he was left with a sharp spider-like piece of metal. He tied it to the rope, so he had a grappling hook now, and hid it under a bush just in case he needed to come back. For the time being, he wanted to find his sisters and Fiona.

He wondered if he should go inside and risk being caught, or if he should try to locate them from outside. He figured that he should go inside, because his sisters were still with Beatrice, and he couldn't think of a way to find them from the exterior. He was about to start off when he saw a most frightening and distressing scene.

In the broken window, was the face of Colette the contortionist, and she did not look too happy. Before Klaus could respond, she picked up a rock and thrust the stone right at Klaus' forehead. Unfortunately (and this is a word that I must use very often), Colette had very good aim, and hit Klaus right were she had planned to. Klaus vision went black, and he couldn't breathe. Staggering, he fell to the ground and closed his eyes.

-:-

Violet stood at the window for a few more minutes, watching the sunset until it was completely dark. She then remembered what it was she had set out to do.

"We have to find Klaus," Violet said to Sunny. "He could be in grave danger," and the littlest Baudelaire nodded her head. They walked to the door, and took one last look at their father's desk.

"I wonder if we'll ever know how it got there," Violet wondered aloud.

"More mysteries. So many," Sunny commented as she shook her head.

"I know," Violet said. "Yet, they all seem to intertwine with one another. It's almost as if everything that has happened to us happened on purpose," she said as she walked out the door and started down the hallway.

Her strategy was to listen in to every door until she heard anything out of place. It wasn't a very efficient process, but given the circumstances, it would have to do. For the next half an hour or so, the children wandered through the hallway searching for their brother and pondering the mysteries at hand. The children listened to every door, but heard nothing. But when they reached the last door, they could hear Count Olaf and his troupe members cackling.

"Well, enough celebrating. Let's get back to work and get rid of the rest of those bratty orphans. One down, two to go!" he said as the villains laughed yet again.

"The rest?" Violet wondered. She once again retreated to her place in the supply closet, Sunny trailing behind her, as the evil villains left the room, off to spread more evil upon the world. When they were gone, Violet and Sunny slowly emerged in. They saw the broken window, and on the ground below, Klaus' body.

"No," Violet said. "No, it can't be," Violet said in disbelief. She followed her instincts and rushed outside as fast as her legs could carry.

"Klaus!" she cried as she ran over to her brother. She shook his shoulders violently and tried to wake him up, but he did not stir. "Please, please, please, wake up, Klaus!" Violet cried but he would not. "Klaus, don't do this to me!" she exclaimed. But Violet knew he was not going to wake up, not ever again. Klaus was dead. Violet embraced her brother and cried. She could simply not believe that her intelligent and resourceful little brother would never speak again, never known about Veronica, never laugh or smile, never read another book, never do anything ever again. Violet and Sunny clutched to each other and wept over this horrible tragedy. They had lost too many people. Their father was gone forever, they never even knew Veronica, and now their brother. The Baudelaires sisters felt alone in the world, and there was nothing they could do to change that.

Now, I know that you may be thinking that the story ends here at this terrible catastrophe. And although I must give credit to Violet and Sunny Baudelaire for being intelligent and well-read people, I can tell you one thing. For once, they were wrong. For as the Baudelaire sisters sit here and mourn over their brother, I can tell you that their efforts were in vain, a phrase which here means, "they did not need to mourn over Klaus, for in fact, he was not dead, as the Baudelaire sisters assumed." When one is hit by a small, hard object traveling at approximately sixty miles per hour, and that certain small object hits them in the forehead, that person can fall unconscious. Most likely, they will not die, unless they are an oversized bully terrorizing a small biblical town and a small boy named David throws a small rock at them. Klaus was simply unconscious.

"Violet?" a weak, hoarse voice asked. Violet looked down at her brother and saw in amazement that he was speaking to her.

"Klaus! You're alive!" Violet said, embracing him tightly.

"Klaus!" Sunny squealed as she hugged him tightly.

"We thought we'd lost you!" Violet exclaimed. "What happened to you?"

"Violet, where am I?" Klaus asked ignoring her question.

"Hotel Denouement, remember?" Violet asked.

"Yes. I do. I was…hit," Klaus said finally.

"With what Klaus? Who did this to you?" Violet demanded.

"Colette," He answered, embracing his sisters with what little strength he had.

"Klaus, there's something I have to tell you," Violet said. "I, um," Violet stammered. "There was another Baudelaire. A girl," Violet said.

"What?" Klaus asked, his eyes wide.

"I had a twin, Veronica. She died, and they didn't tell us," Violet whispered, and she did not have to say who she meant by "they." All three Baudelaires sat in silence, not knowing what to say.

"I think it would be safe if we got out of here," Violet whispered.

"What?" the two younger siblings questioned in amazement.

"I know we need to find out about the sugar bowl, and mom, and everything else, but we can't risk being caught by Olaf again. Besides, I have my suspicions about Captain Widdershins and Fiona. I don't think he abandoned her," Violet remarked shaking her head.

"Well, of course he did! Didn't you see Violet? You were right there! He was gone," Klaus reassured her.

"I know it looks that way, but something doesn't fit into place. I think that Fiona is here with the sugar bowl because I saw her glasses next to a lid that could only belong to a small bowl, like a sugar bowl. But, I think that everything was planned. Beatrice told me something, something I swore not to tell, but I think this can be an exception," Violet said looking serious. "Fiona had planned to join Count Olaf the whole time. Her brother sent her a letter once, a few years ago, and she decided to join him. She couldn't find the right time too, though. She found out somehow that we were traveling down the Stricken Stream, so when her stepfather wasn't looking, she changed their course on the map to find us, and summoned Olaf. She used you Klaus," Violet said putting a hand on her brother's shoulder. "She knew you would like someone who was well-read. She got rid of the Captain by sending him off on some mission that did not exist. She used you so she could get us close to Count Olaf."

"No, but I saw her here! She said she quit his troupe! He kidnapped her!" Klaus said desperately.

"She lied, and I bet the kidnapping was just an act. She wanted you dead, Klaus. I'm sorry." Klaus put his head in his hands, and sat there for a moment.

"But mom, and the sugar bowl. Those are too important to leave behind," Klaus said after some time.

"I think that in this case, Klaus, our own safety is the most important," Violet told her brother. This was a hard decision to make. They still had so much to learn, but they knew it would be useless to them if they were dead. They had no doubt that Count Olaf would try to kill them, as he had done many times in the past. But the sugar bowl, and of course information of their mother, were things that the Baudelaires hesitated to leave behind.

"Violet right, Klaus. Must stay alive," Sunny said from her brother's lap.

"I know she is, Sunny," Klaus sighed. "But how do we get out of here?" he asked. "VFD is going to know we've gone somewhere."

"We don't have to leave now. And when we do leave, the train station isn't too far to walk. Maybe a couple hours or so," Violet said. The thought of walking for a couple hours by themselves at night to a train station to run away from VFD was not a very pleasant thought, but they knew they could do it. After all the dangers they'd faced together, they knew they could venture one more.


	4. The Masked Ball

Chapter Four: The Masked Ball

If you have read the other books in this series, and I certainly hope you have not, then you should know that it is a rare occasion when either Lemony or myself can use the word "luckily." This is for the simple fact that the Baudelaires rarely ever come across a bit of luck in their unfortunate and miserable lives. I would love to use this word more often, but in order to do that, I would have to write some other book, filled with mischievous talking animals and jolly, happy events. I would love to write about things that make children smile all day rather than weep uncontrollably, but I, like Lemony, have sworn myself to recording the sad and unfortunate lives of the Baudelaire orphans, if they are indeed still orphans. Normally, I would take a page out of one of Lemony's previous books, and it would go as such: "If you are interested in stories with happy endings, you would be better off reading some other book. Because not only is there no happy ending, there is no happy beginning, and very few happy things in the middle. This is because not very many happy things happened in the lives of the Baudelaire orphans." However, no matter how unhappy and woeful the previous Baudelaire books were, this one is a bit different. It is true that there is no happy beginning, and very few happy things in the middle, but the ending to this particular book is not one that consists of terrible things that will make you cry yourself to sleep. In this particular volume of the Baudelaires' lives, I am happy to say, the ending is a happy one, and so you will not spend the rest of your life weeping and wondering, "Why on earth must such miserable and unfortunate things happen to such small, innocent, children?" So, getting back to my point, this is one of those rare moments where I can use the word "luckily," but in this case, I guess it is not such a rare occasion, considering that this book is not completely made up of misery and woe, and for that I am thankful.

Luckily, the Baudelaires decided that they should stick around for the rest of the night, just in case anything important happened. Careful to avoid Count Olaf, the children snuck back into the hotel to speak with Beatrice. They winded their way down the hallways and back to Beatrice's room, hoping that she would have come back when Violet didn't return.

Violet rapped on the door with her knuckles, praying that Beatrice was there.

"Come in," a weary voice called. Violet opened the door and stepped inside, followed by her siblings.

"Beatrice, we would-" Violet began.

"Children!" Beatrice interrupted. "You're all right! And you found your brother! Klaus, are you all right?" Beatrice cried jumping out of her seat and running to the children.

"Yes," Klaus said. "I'm fine."

"Where were you?" Beatrice asked.

"Count Olaf is here. His assistants took me hostage, but I escaped," Klaus said, purposely not adding the part about his near-death experience.

"Oh my. Count Olaf? This is dreadful. Is Esme here too?" Beatrice questioned.

"Yes," Violet answered, "and she's wearing her stiletto heals," she said to her grimacing siblings.

"This is horrible. And Violet, does he know that Fiona has the sugar bowl?"

"I don't think so. If he knew she had it, he probably would have squeezed it from her by now," Violet said.

"You're right. Now children, listen up," Beatrice said. "Tonight, there is a meeting for VFD at a friend of mine's, Madame DiLustro. This meeting, though, has been disguised to look like a Halloween masquerade, so several non-members of VFD have been invited as well, just to keep down suspicion. You children must come with me too, for you three are a matter we must discuss. I have disguises for you," she said, and went to a trunk at the foot of her bed. She pulled out a beautiful red gown, made African style, for Violet. There was a brown suit that looked like it belonged to a detective for Klaus, and finally, there was a small pumpkin suit for Sunny to wear.

"You three get changed in there," Beatrice said, pointing to a large closet. "I will get into my costume as well," she said, and disappeared into the bathroom.

The children fidgeted with their clothing for a long while until they were finally dressed. Violet looked like a real princess, and she had tied her hair up in her ribbon just like she was inventing something, only it was just for looks. Klaus looked like a smartly dressed businessman far over the age of thirteen, and Sunny looked rather cute, and though the suit was quite uncomfortable, she did look very much like a pumpkin.

"I fee like a different person," Violet said. "And you two look like different people," she said to Klaus and Sunny.

"We feel like different people too," Klaus said.

"Vegetable," Sunny pointed out.

"Except Sunny isn't portraying a person. She's a vegetable," Klaus said smiling at his little sister.

"Ready to go?" Beatrice said from behind them. She was wearing a dragonfly costume that was large and green, complete with glittery wings emerging from her back. Her face was covered in small rhinestones and glitter make-up. Her costume was so good, that if one looked at her, one would think that she was an oversized dragonfly.

"Yes," Klaus said answering Beatrice's question. "We're ready."

"All right, lets go. I have a cab waiting outside the hotel," Beatrice said, ushering the children out the door. The children winded down the halls yet again, and out the front doors of the hotel.

It was late at night, so it was pitch-black, save the headlights on the yellow cab across the street. The children remembered not too long ago when they had gotten in the taxicab with Kit Snicket. They had learned so much since then, that when they opened the doors of the automobile and went inside, it was nothing at all like when they had done it on Briny Beach.

The entire ride to Madame DiLustro's mansion, Violet thought about Veronica, and what she might have been like. Would she have possessed the same inventing skills that Violet did? Or would she have had some other talent? Violet wondered what it would be like to have a twin, to be like Duncan and Isadora Quagmire. She was upset that her parents never told her about Veronica, but she reassured herself with the thought that perhaps they had planned to when Violet got older, just like VFD and all the other secrets the Baudelaire parents had hid from them. But most of all, she wondered if her mother would ever tell her that, and that small hope stuck with her for the remainder of the evening.

Klaus thought about Fiona, and how she had so cruelly tricked him into believing she actually had feelings for him.

"I should have known better," he thought to himself. "I shouldn't have trusted her. Her brother is the hook-handed man after all!"

Sunny thought about her mother, and how much she missed her mother tucking her inside her crib and singing her a lullaby. Sunny wondered if she would ever truly see her mother again, and this thought was the one that lingered in the air surrounding the Baudelaire children for the rest of the ride, so the whole car seemed as if it were a mystery itself, rather than a yellow device used for transporting people to various places.

"We're here," Beatrice announced after a long and rather awkward silence. The children were jolted out of their thoughts and placed back in the real world faster than you could say, "Count Olaf is quickly approaching!"

The children got out of the car one by one, and saw the magnificent house that Madame DiLustro owned (of which I have been to many times). It was a large mansion, much like theirs had been, only, it was probably ten times bigger than the Baudelaire mansion had been in its former glory.

There were many other people unloading themselves from large limousines or yellow taxicabs, wearing fine costumes and walking in to the large, lit-up house's ballroom. The children walked across the street and towards the house with Beatrice by their side. They reached the door, where a large man wearing a pinstripe suit and holding a clipboard was ushering people in after checking off their names on a large guest list.

"Names?" he asked in a rough, gruff voice when the Baudelaires reached the double doors at the front of the house.

"The world is quiet here. B, V, K, and S," Beatrice replied to the man, and he quickly moved aside for them. Once they entered the main hallway, Beatrice handed the children three masks that covered their eyes with small holes punched in the front so they could see.

"What are these for?" Violet asked.

"They are to conceal your identities. You never know what kind of evil villains are lurking about. Put them on," Beatrice ordered the children as she fastened one around herself. The children tied them in the back of their heads, so that if the Baudelaires had just seen each other for the first time since they had slipped on their costumes, they would not have recognized each other.

Beatrice led them down the hallway and into the ballroom, which was filled with thousands of people in various costumes. There was very loud music playing from a band dressed in red uniforms, and the room was brightly lit with a crystal chandelier that hung on the ceiling above them. There were two grand staircases that wound up to a large balcony at the far end of the room with a door in the center of it.

"I have some business to attend to," Beatrice said to the children. "You just mingle. If anyone asks your names, you are Sally, James, and Amiee. Understood?" she asked the Baudelaires, and they nodded their heads. Beatrice rushed off through the crowd, her glittery wings sparkling as she trailed through the people.

"Is this so dangerous that we must wear masks and use false names?" Klaus questioned.

"We should trust Beatrice's judgment. After all, she is a member of VFD," Violet answered.

"Secret," Sunny pointed out.

"Sunny's right, Violet. Our parents did keep it a secret from us," Klaus said. "Maybe VFD isn't such a noble organization after all."

"Don't be absurd," Violet frowned. "This side of the schism is good, remember? There are people who start fires, and people who put them out. These are the people who do the latter," Violet said using an expression which here means, "They do the second one I referred to."

"I guess so," Klaus said. "Oh no."

"What?" his sisters asked in unison.

"Look," he said, pointing to a man wearing a pirate suit, an eye patch, a large captain's hat, and a peg leg where his left leg should have been. Even though his back was turned to them, the Baudelaires were almost positive that he had one eyebrow instead of two, long fingernails, and filthy grooming habits.

"Olaf," Sunny gulped, and I am sorry to say that the youngest Baudelaire was correct. Count Olaf was at Madame DiLustro's party that evening, wearing one of his ridiculous disguises. This particular one was a suit that the Baudelaires had seen before, when they had lived with their Aunt Josephine above Lake Lachrymose. Count Olaf had come up with another repulsive scheme to get his filthy hands on the Baudelaires' fortune, a scheme that required prancing about in a false peg leg to conceal his tattoo and calling himself Captain Sham.

"Oh no," Klaus said again.

"Oh my," Violet whispered, for at that very moment, another villain came to stand next to Count Olaf. She was wearing a ridiculous outfit as well, and this was just as, if not more, horrifying. She was wearing a large dress that was sown together with red, orange, and yellow triangle-shaped pieces of cloth, sown so that each one was layered on top of the one above it. A huge, black and gray neck collar that exceeded far above her head was sown to the dress as well, and when the villain walked about, the dress made a crackling sound on the ground. This dress was made to look like a fire, Esme Squalor's favorite weapon, for indeed this villainous and stylish woman was Count Olaf's evil girlfriend, Esme Gigi Genevieve Squalor.

"Danger," Sunny whispered to her siblings. "Hide!"

"Sunny's right. Let's try to hide ourselves amongst the crowd," Violet whispered urgently to her siblings. But the Baudelaires were not able to conceal themselves within the large group of people, for at that moment, a man was running through the crowd, rudely shoving people aside. He was dressed as a bullfighter, and was also wearing a red mask over his face. He pushed and shoved, hitting Violet as he did so.

Violet fell to the ground and slid on the floor, cutting her shoulder on a sharp piece of glass that was lying on the floor and had been broken off a wineglass. She winced in pain and gently touched her shoulder. It was wet and sticky, and she realized that she was bleeding as her siblings rushed to her side.

"Violet!" Klaus cried, kneeling beside her as Violet bit her hand hard to keep from crying out.

"Violet!" Sunny screamed as she scurried to her big sister.

"Are you all right?" Klaus demanded. Violet weakly nodded her head as she struggled to sit up, despite the sharp pains in her arm.

"Violet! Bleeding!" Sunny cried. Violet took her hand out of her mouth, and the youngest Baudelaires saw a few tears streak her face.

"I need something to stop it," Violet winced. By this time, a large crowd had gathered around Violet to see what that commotion was all about.

"I have something!" a woman wearing a cat costume cried. She pulled a white handkerchief out of her purse. Klaus smiled gratefully and took it from her hand. He wrapped it around Violet's shoulder and tied it in a knot. The makeshift bandage immediately turned red, but the bleeding was slowing down and stopping.

"I'm fine," Violet said, and upon those words, the crowd returned to their previous activities and left the children to themselves.

"What happened?" Klaus eagerly asked his sister.

"I cut my shoulder on a piece of glass," she said, picking up the small piece that had caused the injury and holding it up. "It looks like it was broken off a wineglass."

"People should be more careful, or at the very least, pick up the mess they make," Klaus sighed.

"Listen to you," Violet said. "You sound like mother," she said, trying to brighten up the situation. At the mention of Mrs. Baudelaire, all three children again stepped across the line that separated the good memories of their parents from the bad. The children did not want to remember the times when Mrs. Baudelaire had gotten angry with the children. The children though, despite their predicament, found themselves giggling over the prospect of Klaus acting like a mother. The Baudelaires felt better for the moment, until Klaus remember who had caused Violet's discomfort.

"That man," Klaus said, "seemed to be running from something, or rather someone. I wonder what it was."

"He seemed vaguely familiar, didn't he?" Violet wondered aloud, but the Baudelaires couldn't really agree with her, considering that his face was covered up completely.

"Back off, B!" the Baudelaires heard a loud voice say.

Violet gulped.

The voice, unfortunately, was very familiar. The voice, unfortunately, was one that belonged to a woman who was as stylish as she was villainous. The voice, unfortunately, belonged to Esme Squalor, and the person she referred to as B, unfortunately, was Beatrice. And if the tone of her voice was any indication, Esme Gigi Genevieve Squalor was not happy.

"Oh no," Violet said, and with the help of her brother, stood up. "Something is wrong." The Baudelaires rushed towards where they heard the voice, only to wish that they hadn't rushed to it when they got there.

The scene that was occurring before their eyes was one that I am a sure, that you, the weeping reader, has heard of. Lemony has mentioned it several times in his previous books, and so I am almost positive that you know it by heart, save a few minor details. On the balcony, was Esme Squalor, dressed in her flame-imitating dress, holding a small, clear object that closely resembled a sugar bowl. Not only did it resemble a sugar bowl, it was a sugar bowl. It was not just a sugar bowl, but the sugar bowl, the sugar bowl that the Queequeg was assigned to locate and escort back to Hotel Denouement. Across from Esme were several people, one of whom was Beatrice, clad in her dragonfly costume. Next to her, was a man that was unrecognizable, for he too was wearing a mask. And behind her, was a man dressed as a bullfighter.

"Give me the sugar bowl," Beatrice said calmly.

"Never. Thanks to Hooky, I now can destroy the only remaining traces of our crimes, and then we will be free! Why should I give it to you?" Esme demanded, cackling loudly.

"It's not too late to join us, Esme. It's not too late to become a noble person, and go back to your old days serving on the good side of the schism," Beatrice said quietly.

"Being villainous to small, helpless children is in! So is committing arson! Putting out fires is out!" Esme cried.

"Esme, the bowl," Beatrice said.

"Beatrice, don't do this!" the man dressed as a bullfighter said.

"I love being a villain! Why don't you join me instead, and you can have your precious sugar bowl!" Esme cried, holding out the sugar bowl. "Besides, it's too late for me, Beatrice. I cannot go back," Esme whispered quietly, using Beatrice's real name.

"It's never too late," Beatrice said, taking a step closer to Esme.

"Don't come any closer!" Esme cried. "This knife is very deadly, and very in! I won't hesitate to destroy you! Just like I will destroy the sugar bowl when you are dead!" she said, holding a weapon that the Baudelaires recognized from their brief stay at Heimlich Hospital. Esme had attempted to conduct an unnecessary surgery on Violet, so while Violet herself did not recognize it, the younger Baudelaires did, and they worried for Beatrice's safety, but they were afraid that if they said something, Esme would try to kill them too.

"You wouldn't destroy me," Beatrice said confidently, "just like you wouldn't destroy the sugar bowl."

"I will, B! I'm warning you!" Esme cried, and suspended the sugar bowl over the edge of the balcony. Beatrice cringed, but did not loose her cool.

"Beatrice, Count Olaf is-" the man in the bullfighter costume started, but unfortunately, Esme saw something that made her do something she would regret all her life, and even though she is a villainous person, I feel sorry for her, for at heart, she was not evil. Esme saw her evil boyfriend approaching, (Olaf is pure evil at heart though, unlike Esme, I am sure of it) and made a quick decision. She did not want to look like a coward and a fool in front of Olaf and his troupe, so she acted quickly.

"Say goodbye to your love, L!" Esme cried, and swung the knife at Beatrice.

"No!" the man dressed as a bullfighter (who appeared to be L) cried.

Needless to say, Beatrice was no longer a part of the Baudelaires' lives, or the life of L. The Baudelaires shut their eyes as this terrible, horrible thing happened and clung to each other tightly.

"Olaf! It's the orphans!" Esme cried, pointing at the Baudelaires. They opened their eyes, averting them from the remains of my dear friend Beatrice, and ran as fast as their legs could carry them. They ran out the door, and into the street, down the roads and through alleys, Count Olaf and his troupe behind them.

"Give it up orphans! You'll never get away!" he cried in his nasty, wheezy voice. The Baudelaires ignored him.

"Over there, the alley!" Violet panted, running towards a dark tunnel. They were now far ahead of Olaf, so they swerved into the alley and hid themselves behind some trashcans. They held their breath as Olaf and his evil troupe members ran past the alley, unaware that the people they were chasing were hiding there.

"We're safe," Violet whispered after she was sure the danger had passed. "We need to leave now. We have nothing here! Count Olaf is looking for us. We're not safe," Violet whispered.

"But the VFD meeting is on Thursday, and it's still Wednesday! We can't miss that!" Klaus whispered back.

"I have a feeling there won't be a meeting. Beatrice is dead," Violet whispered gravely.

"We don't know that for sure!" Klaus cried desperately.

"What's more important? Some information about something we barely know about, or our lives?" Violet demanded harshly. Klaus and Sunny saw that Violet was crying. "I know we wanted to know about VFD, but if Count Olaf finds us, he'll kill us, and then that information will be useless! I want to know where mom is just as much as you do!" she cried. "But we can't stay, Klaus. Don't you see?" she cried miserably. "Don't you see?" She put her head in her hands and sobbed quietly.

Violet placed her head on Klaus' shoulder and cried, cried out what she had been holding in for so long. She was frustrated. She wanted to know if her mother was truly alive. But most of all, Violet wanted to go back. She wanted to open her eyes and find herself back in her house, reading in the library, or working on an invention. She wanted her parents to say goodnight once more, to say, "I love you." She cried and cried until she had no more tears.

"Violet right. Must go now. We go. Come. Violet, please feel better!" Sunny said, snuggling against her older sister.

"Okay, Sunny," Violet smiled. "Let's go."


	5. The Survivors

Chapter Five: The Survivors 

The Baudelaires arrived at the train station at around five o'clock in the morning after a long period of walking. Violet's prediction, unfortunately, had been wrong. The children had been walking all night. It was the same station they had been at when they went to Paltryville to work at the Lucky Smells Lumbermill. The place was deserted, save one lonely man working behind the counter.

"Excuse me, sir," Violet asked the man.

"Yes?" he asked looking away from his computer.

"We were wondering how much a ticket to…" she said glancing at the list of destinations, "Plackford is." The man typed something on his computer and squinted at the screen.

"Forty-five dollars, miss," the man replied.

"Thank you," Violet said, and walked to some seats in the corner of the room, her siblings following.

"Forty-five dollars is a lot of money," Klaus said, "and we don't have any! How are we going to get somewhere?" Klaus questioned his older sister. Violet reached into her pocket for a hair ribbon, and tied it in her long hair.

"Then there's only one thing left to do," Violet said. "Sneak onboard."

Sneaking onboard something, whether it be a train, an automobile, or a secret jet carrying a certain sugar bowl containing various files concerning mysterious fires, is neither a very polite nor safe task to carry out. First of all, there are probably several people surrounding the place, making it very hard to sneak on without someone noticing and ratting you out. Second of all, if you are caught, your parents will probably be called, and they will not be too happy with what you have done, assuming you are a child and that your parents are alive and have not perished in some terrible fire. The Baudelaires, however, had a couple of advantages. After several weeks of research, I can conclude that there were hardly any people at the Tedium Train Station that particular night, save one homeless man begging for spare change from whomever he might see. He was not too successful with his profits that night either. The other advantage was that the Baudelaires' parents were either dead or hidden at some secret location, therefore, in the event that the Baudelaires were not successful in their sneaking attempts, they would not get in any real trouble. The Baudelaires thought for a moment about all the other dastardly deeds that they had committed while trying to escape Olaf's clutches, although none of them had been entirely intentional.

"Do you think we should? It's not the best idea to sneak on some train going to a town we don't even know about and have randomly selected for a hiding location," Klaus said to his sisters.

"Can you think of anything better?" Violet questioned her brother.

"Luggage," Sunny said, which meant something along the lines of, "Due to my size, it probably would not be too difficult to conceal myself inside a suitcase, though it would be rather confining and lacking of air."

"You probably could, Sunny," Klaus said nodding his head. "But I'm not sure that it would be very safe, considering we don't know where that suitcase might be departing, and both Violet and myself are far too big to hide inside a suitcase," he pointed out.

"True," Sunny said.

"Well, if we can't sneak on board, then what do you suggest we do?" Violet asked her younger siblings. They thought for a moment, then gave each other distraught glances.

"I really can't think of anything," Klaus said.

"Then it's settled. Now, only one question left. Exactly how do we sneak onboard a train?" Violet asked, whom, as a relatively obedient child, was not very experienced in sneaking aboard vehicles.

"I suppose we could go in the luggage storage compartment," Klaus said, thoughtfully stroking his chin.

"Is there room in the luggage storage compartment for one young girl and two adolescents?" Violet asked her brother.

"I think so, but juts in case, maybe we should check it out," Klaus suggested, and the Baudelaires decided that would be best. Making sure they did not arouse the suspicions of the man behind the counter, they wandered down a dark hallway after consulting a rather complex and confusing map of the boarding terminals. They came to a door marked, "AUTHORIZED PERSONNEL ONLY."

"This is the door we want," Klaus said, and pushed it open. To his surprise, it was unlocked. The train station, apparently, did not expect anyone to be sneaking onboard the luggage compartment, much to the delight of the youngsters. Upon entering the unguarded room, the Baudelaires surveyed their surroundings.

They could see that they were on the other side of the boarding terminal, the place where nobody except authorized personnel, hence the sign, were allowed to venture. There were two men working inside the ordinarily bustling tunnel, loading a few boxes and suitcases on to the back of the train. The Baudelaires concealed themselves behind a large pile of packing tape, used for those who were not professional box-packers and did not store their belongings in the proper way, therefore making one extra job for the already busy workers. When they strained their necks, they could see that the luggage storage compartment was very large, and relatively empty.

"Really do?" Sunny asked.

"Yes, Violet, are you sure that we really need to do this? We could always go back, and VFD wouldn't even have noticed we were gone," Klaus asked.

"Maybe VFD wouldn't have noticed, but I almost positive that Count Olaf would have. He's looking for us, Klaus. If we don't go right now, we'll miss our only chance. This is the last train leaving tonight," and the eldest Baudelaire spoke the truth. The Baudelaires considered their situation for a moment, until Violet broke the silence.

"We have to go right now, Klaus and Sunny," she said and grabbed her siblings hands. Without uttering another word, the eldest Baudelaire pulled her siblings onto the train tracks and into the damp storage compartment of the train. As the Baudelaires stuffed themselves inside, the could hear a loud creaking sound as one of the workers closed the large doors in back of the train, and left the children in utter darkness. They held onto each other tight so they would not be separated. After a moment, their eyesight adjusted to the darkness, and they could make out figures of boxes and suitcases scattered across the large and empty room.

"Klaus? Sunny?" Violet asked just to make sure it was her siblings' dark outlines she could see, and not the dark outlines of some strangers.

"Yes," Sunny said. "We here."

"We exactly are we going?" Violet asked. "Do you know where Plackford is?" she asked her brother. Klaus closed his eyes, and tried to remember if he had ever read a book about Plackford.

"Plackford," he recited, recalling an old book entitled, Small Towns You Should Never Visit, "is a small town just outside the city of Boston, Massachusetts. It is widely known for its production of Grandma's Choco Chip Cookies."

"Cookies?" Sunny asked. "Not important," the littlest Baudelaire said, but after an extensive period of research, I have found that this statement was incorrect. A cookie can be very important if you are starving to death and it is the only thing inside the pantry. It can also be important if a secret member of a secret organization is smuggling a secret message hidden in a secret code inside a very secretive cookie to you, secretly, of course. Though in this situation, the youngest Baudelaire was right, the cookies would not be important.

"Sunny's right," Violet said. "Can you remember anything else about it, Klaus?" Violet asked.

"Not really. I only looked at a few sections of the book, because it was very dull. If only I had read the whole thing!" Klaus muttered to himself.

"Well, we can't change the past," Violet said. The siblings glanced at each other, and knew the statement was true. You cannot change the past. If they could go back, just once, they would have convinced their parents to come with them to the beach on that horrible day, so perhaps their lives could have been spared. But they couldn't, at least not physically. But they could go back in their memories, and see their parents faces', read one more book, invent one more thing for pleasure, not to frantically save them in a desperate situation, bite on just one of the armrests again, cook a delicious meal the whole family could enjoy.

The train rumbled beneath them, starting on its way, jolting the children in the cart. Huffing and puffing, the train moved out of the tunnel, and the children could see traces of the first morning light through some windows high up on the walls. The room was flooded with light as the train emerged completely, and they could see how filthy and inappropriate their hiding place was. It was covered in soot and grime all along the walls and floor. There were quite a few nasty spiders crawling across the floor, which Klaus wasn't particularly fond of. The door was barred shut with a long strip of metal, and the windows were slightly open, letting a chilling gust of wind inside.

"Well," Violet said grimly. "I wonder how long we'll be in here."

"Who knows," Klaus said, avoiding a small spider crawling near his shoe. "It could be hours." Just at that moment, a small scrap of paper flew by their faces. Klaus reached out his hand and grabbed it as it whisked by.

"It's a schedule," he said. "Look, it's for this train," he commented, amazed at his good fortune.

"How did that get here?" she asked.

"I don't know," he said. "But look. Plackford is only one hour away," he said.

"One hour," Violet said to herself. "What should we do until then?" she asked, but as if fate had planned it, something unusual caught Sunny's eye.

"Open!" she cried and pointed to a large, brown, leather briefcase in the corner of the room, the lid wide open.

"Who would leave this open?" Klaus asked as the children crawled to the mysterious item of luggage. Inside, was a large stack of papers, held together with a pink paper clip. There was a laminated card with the words, "the world is quiet here," on the front, and a picture of a man with a hat on that covered his eyes. On the bottom were two initials, LS.

"This person must belong to VFD," Klaus said, fingering the mysterious card. "But who is he? What does the LS stand for?" he asked.

"I think I know," Violet said, picking up the large file. "Beatrice mentioned him once. I think she was referring to Lemony Snicket, her ex-fiancée and Jacques' brother. But Klaus, look at this. The file is titled-" she hesitated.

"What?" Klaus and Sunny asked in unison.

"Baudelaire," Violet whispered. She turned the first page to see a picture of a house burning to the ground, next to a picture of her parents. The children knew at once that this was their home as it burned to the ground. "It says here, 'The scientific principles of the convergence and refraction of light, of which I am not so familiar with, caused the fire. Count Olaf started it, though the judges have yet to charge him guilty of arson.' Look, here's a picture of us," Violet commented upon turning the page. "It was taken at Briny Beach," she said in amazement.

Klaus took the paper from her hand and read the caption under the picture. "The children at Briny Beach on the day Mr. Poe informed them, incorrectly, of their parents' death," he read. "Incorrectly? Mother must be alive! She has to be! Look, there's more. Here's a picture of Uncle Monty's house," he said. "It says that the house was later on burned to the ground. Quigley was right," he said, flipping the pages. "There are pictures of each place we've been to, from Lake Lachrymose to Mount Fraught and the Queequeg. It seems that this Lemony Snicket man was following us."

"Look here, this says it's new information," Violet said. "It's about last night at Madame DiLustro's masquerade. Here's a newspaper clipping. 'B makes attempt to steal sugar bowl from E.'"

"B? E?" Sunny asked.

"Beatrice and Esme," Violet explained as she scanned the paper. "Lemony was there that night too. He was disguised as a… a bullfighter. "

"The ball! He was at the ball! That's who pushed you! He was in love with Beatrice! So Lemony is definitely following us," Klaus said.

"How he follow us and we not know?" Sunny asked.

"I'm not sure. But he's researching us for sure," Klaus said taking the paper. "It even says-" but Klaus could not finish. He smiled at his sisters. "It says where Mom is."

"Mother?" Violet asked in amazement. "Where?"

"Plackford," Klaus answered with a wide grin on his face. The Baudelaires were in luck for once in their unfortunate lives.

"Wow. That's unbelievable! Hey what's this?" Violet asked. She reached into the briefcase and saw a note addressed to the Baudelaires.

"It's for us," she said.

"Read," Sunny urged.

"To Violet, Klaus and Sunny Baudelaire, from Quigley Quagmire," Violet began. "He's alive," she breathed.

"I told you, Violet," Klaus grinned.

"It is not yet safe to reveal my current location," she went on, "so I have sent you this. Lemony Snicket asked me to put this inside the train to Plackford moments ago. He is traveling with you inside the main part of the train, and can undoubtedly see you right now on the train's security cameras located on the ceiling," Violet continued, and the siblings looked up. They saw the tiny cameras they had not noticed before, and shuddered at the thought of someone watching them, but then they realized that someone had been watching them all this time, since the terrible fire that destroyed their home.

"Go on Violet," Klaus said.

"He has been researching you all this time as a mission for VFD. In order to speak with this man, you must do as follows: when you get off the train, approach the street vendor across from the station selling olives, and ask for a jar of green olives. If all goes well, he will hand you a green envelope instead. Inside will be a note telling you what to do next, and do precisely what it says, only perform the steps in reverse order, so you will be starting with the last instruction. Violet, do not worry, I am safe. I miss you. Signed, Quigley Quagmire," Violet finished.

"What odd instructions," Klaus commented. "It's impossible to do precisely what the instructions say and in reverse order at the same time."

"Well, we know what he means. But I agree. Perhaps the instructions are to prevent anyone from knowing we met with him. After all, VFD is a secret organization. They probably don't like members meeting in public like that," Violet said, and the Baudelaires nodded.

For the remainder of the bumpy ride in the uncomfortable storage compartment of the train, the children looked over the file marked Baudelaire. They stared at the security cameras, wondering what Lemony Snicket was doing, and how he knew that the children were on the train to Plackford, or for that matter, how he knew where they were at any time during their lives. They found out a lot, like why Lemony was researching them, and why Beatrice couldn't marry him, due to the wishes of her controlling parents. The children even dozed off for a while after an exhausting night of walking.

Finally, the train started slowing down. The children placed the file back inside the briefcase and locked it with the key they had found under the note from Quigley. Violet held Sunny in her arms, and Klaus clasped the briefcase in his hands as they waited for the workers to come and open the door. They once again found themselves in unfathomable darkness as the train emerged into a dark tunnel somewhere in Plackford.

After what seemed like quite some time, the workers came to the back of the train and unlocked the large doors in the back of the train. As they unloaded the boxes and suitcases, the children slipped out of the large doors unnoticed, and made their way to the door out of the tunnel. They consulted yet another map, and wandered down the empty hallways and into a bustling waiting room by the front of the train station. There were people sleeping in chairs, purchasing tickets, buying coffee and snacks, and reading books.

"Remember, we should stay hidden. All of these people must read The Daily Punctilio, and who knows what they've printed about us since we've been out of touch with the press lately," Violet whispered to her siblings.

"Do you think they'll recognize us?" Klaus asked. "Maybe we should wear a disguise."

"Have on!" Sunny whispered, pointing to her pumpkin suit.

"They don't conceal our faces. And you can take that off Sunny, as long as you're wearing clothes underneath. Well, Violet, you could wear my glasses, and Sunny could wrap my sweater around her until she looks like a big bundle," Klaus suggested.

"No like," Sunny frowned. "But good. Need to be safe. I do it if it's for good cause."

"But what about you?" Violet asked.

"I will…I will," he said, looking around. "I don't really have anything. But as long as you two stay in front of me, I should be fine," he said.

"All right, Klaus, give me your glasses," Violet said. Klaus took them out of his case and handed them to Violet. Her vision became blurry suddenly, and she couldn't make heads or tails of anything. Sunny wrapped herself in the sweater until she couldn't see either. Klaus picked her up and tried to carry her so that she wouldn't be uncomfortable, but it wouldn't look like he was carrying a young girl.

"Klaus, I can't see anything," Violet whispered. "You're going to need to help me get around."

"All right. At least I only need my glasses for reading, otherwise, I don't know how we'd manage," Klaus said and took hold of Violet's arm so he could help her walk. They moved slowly across the room until they reached the front door. Pushing on it with his back, Klaus opened the door, and saw that the morning sun was high in the sky. He shielded his eyes with his hand as he looked for the street vendor selling olives. The street was deserted and old. There were a few shops here and there, selling trinkets and gadgets that seemed to have no apparent use, and one lonely house on the end of town. As far as he could see, Klaus could spot desert surrounding the town.

"I'm not sure," Violet said, "but could that be it?" she said pointing to a cart, or in her case, a large blur.

"I think so," Klaus replied squinting in the sunlight. "Yes, it is," he said after a moment. "There's no one here. We can take off our disguises," he said, much to the relief of his sisters. Violet removed the glasses and placed them inside the case with the silver button that she had invented for Klaus when he was seven. Sunny unraveled herself from the sweater, and Klaus put it back on in the chilly weather. They walked across the street and to the vendor.

"Sir," Violet said to the man working the cart. "May we have one jar of green olives?" she asked, following Quigley's instructions. Just as the note said, he handed her a green envelope instead. "Thank you," she said politely, and motioned for her brother and sister to follow her to a park bench by the small hat store. They sat down on the bench as Violet tore open the envelope. Inside, just as Quigley said, was a note written in scraggly handwriting.

"Let's see," Violet muttered. "We are supposed to start with the last instruction. Here it is," she said pointing to the bottom of the page. "It says, 'Finally, go into the hat store. There will be a welcome mat by the door. Underneath, there will be the exact amount of money for the pink hat with the black feather on top. Purchase it.' All right, let's go," Violet said.

"This is rather odd," Klaus commented.

"It is, isn't it?" Violet agreed as they approached the hat store. When they opened the door, a little bell above jingled. They saw there was a welcome mat on the floor, just as the note had said. Careful not to disturb the lady behind the counter, they lifted it up to find fifteen dollars and twenty-three cents.

"Perfect," Violet whispered. Klaus took the money and grabbed a pink hat with a black feather on top off the shelf. He went up to the lady at the desk.

"Good day, ma'am," he said. "I would like to purchase this hat," he said, and placed the hat on the counter.

"That'll be fifteen dollars and twenty-three cents," the lady retorted. Klaus handed her the money.

"Thank you," he said, and took the hat off the counter. The children walked out of the store, and Violet read aloud the next, or in this case, previous, step.

"These instructions were made so that if you were to try to follow them in the correct order, they would make no sense. They were just written backwards," Violet commented. "Any way, 'Then, sit on the park bench and wait for a man with a red fez to sit on the bench with you. If you give him the black feather, he will hand you a small bag with a hamburger patty inside. Do what he says.' What's a red fez?" Violet asked Klaus.

"It's a hat, mostly worn by people in Arabia. This is getting even more strange," he said shaking his head.

"We'd better do what it says," Violet said as the three children sat once again on the bench. They waited only a few minutes before a man with dark skin and black hair approached them. He was wearing a red fez. He sat down on the bench next to Sunny, and pretended to read the newspaper he had in his hand. Sunny took the feather from her brother and handed it to the man. He leaned in close to Sunny to whisper to her.

"I am glad that you are here," the man said in an Arabian accent, stuffing the feather in his pocket. "We were waiting for a long time, Baudelaires," he said, and handed Sunny a small bag with a patty in it. "Follow the next instruction," he said and consulted his watch. He stood up and tipped his hat to the Baudelaires. As quick as he came, he went away.

"Well, Violet, what now?" Klaus asked.

"It says that we should go behind the store that sells china cats. There's going to be a heavy gate there, and several dogs tied up to it. We should throw the patty far away from them, and when they go chase it, with all their strength combined, they should be able to open this gate that we wouldn't be able to," Violet said. "Let's go."

The children located the china cat store (and though I have researched this topic extensively, I have not yet found out why this store happened to be located in Plackford) and went behind it, into a dirty piece of land. There was a big fence that had gated in this whole section of town, for what reason, I know not, and there were six heavy dogs tied up to it on the other side. This gate was much taller than Violet, and rusty and black. As soon as the children turned the corner, the dogs started yapping loudly, as if the Baudelaires were burglars cleaning out a house.

Hesitantly, the children approached the gate. Violet took the patty from Sunny and threw it over the fence as far as she could. Once again, this method worked perfectly, and the dogs ran wildly to the patty, pulling the gate open. The Baudelaires quickly stepped inside the fence, careful to avoid the dogs as they argued over the meat. Violet pulled out the note and read the next instruction.

"I still don't understand why we have to do all this," Klaus said. "It just seems ridiculous."

"I know, but I'm sure there's a reason for this…procedure," Violet replied, not sure of what word she should use.

"I guess so," Klaus said. "So what now?"

"Well, there should be bicycle around here. We're supposed to ride it towards the mountain that looks like a thumb until we see a refrigerator box," Violet said, trying not to laugh. "This is ridiculous. A refrigerator box in the middle of a desert?" Despite everything, the children found themselves laughing at the absurd tasks they had to carry out. If only they had been members of VFD, they would have known that everyone, when being admitted into VFD, must do this as well.

"There!" Sunny cried and pointed towards a bicycle with two seats and two sets of pedals.

"There's only two seats!" Violet said. "And three of us. Although I'm not sure Sunny has any bicycle riding experience."

"I can't remember the last time I rode a bicycle," Klaus said. "It seems like ages ago. I suppose Sunny can ride in that basket," he said referring to a pink basket attached to the front handlebars.

"Is that safe?" Violet questioned.

"Safe, but uncomfortable," Klaus replied. "Let's get going. I'm eager to see what lies ahead on the road less traveled."

This is an expression that I am sure you are familiar with, although I hope not, considering it was used before in previous books in this dreadful series. If you are familiar with this, than that means you must have read these books before, and spent more of your leisure time weeping instead of watching television, or playing with your boomerang collection. I pause here yet again to remind you to put down this book at once, for it only goes downhill from here, a phrase which here means, "Gets worse as you progress through the unfortunate lives of the Baudelaire orphans."

"Yes. Come on Sunny, I'll help you settle in," Violet said as she picked Sunny up in her arms and walked to the bicycle. She placed Sunny in the pink basket and made sure that she was as comfortable and safe as possible before settling herself in the back seat of the bike. Klaus got in the front, and Violet wrapped her arms around his waist so she would not fall off. They peddled off in the direction of the odd mountains.

"There it is! The mountain that looks like a thumb!" Klaus shouted over the wind.

"I think I've seen it before!" Violet wondered aloud, raising her voice in order to be heard over the racket. "Before you were born, Klaus, when I was very little!"

"Lean to the left!" Klaus cried as he turned the handlebars. "We'll talk later! In the meantime, keep an eye open for the refrigerator box!" As soon as he spoke, the children could see a large, brown figure in the distance.

"That's it!" Violet cried and held on tight as her brother twisted the bicycle in that direction. Finally, Klaus stopped peddling, and Violet followed suit. They got off the bike and helped Sunny out of her basket. Slowly, with caution, they approached the refrigerator box.

"Well, what now?" Klaus asked.

"It says to open it up and go inside. Hmm…" Violet thought.

"What?" Sunny asked.

"Apparently, this isn't a refrigerator box. It's some sort of transportation device. There should be a red button that we're supposed to push. The note says to hold on tight. That's the last, or rather, first, instruction." Violet opened up the lid of the sideways box, so it was like opening a door. They then pressed the red button and held on as something strange happened.

The box was not a refrigerator box, just as Violet predicted. It was a secret elevator used by members of VFD when something dangerous was chasing them, such as a grizzly bear, or a lion, or a mob of angry teenagers. This was not an ordinary elevator, and therefore, it didn't work ordinarily either. It plunged downwards.

The Baudelaires screamed as the box traveled down and down, deep underground, until finally, after what seemed like hours but was really only a few moments, the box came to a halt. They sat for a moment and caught their breath. Their hearts were beating wildly from the fall, and it took them a moment to realize they were alive.

"Is everybody all right?" Klaus asked.

"Yes," Violet answered.

"No," Sunny said. The littlest Baudelaire had hit her head on the wall in all the commotion, and it was throbbing in pain. Klaus picked her up and made sure that she wasn't seriously injured. After a thorough inspection, he saw that she was all right, and gave his little sister a kiss on the top of the head.

The Baudelaires wondered if they should open the doors, or if the box would become flooded with sand if they did. But the Baudelaires didn't have to think about what they would do, because at that moment, the door opened. Standing in front of them was a man with a hat covering his eyes.

"Baudelaires," the man said in a gruff voice. "My name is Lemony Snicket."

The Baudelaires were silent. They knew that all this was to meet with Mr. Snicket, but they had no idea that he would meet them like this.

"Please, come in," he said, and stepped aside to reveal a hallway with a big door with a strange lock on it at the end of the hallway. They stepped outside the box, Lemony behind them. There was a plaque on the wall that read, "VOLUNTEER FIRE DEPARTURE #4."

"Where are we?" Violet asked timidly.

"We are at VFD headquarters," he replied.

"But, it was burned down," Klaus said uncertainly.

"That was the one in Mortmain Mountains. There are several headquarters throughout the world, only one was burned. This one is a bit harder to find, which is fortunate for us, but unfortunate for our enemies," Lemony said. He went to the door and punched in a combination of letters into it until the lock whizzed and clicked, opening the door.

"Lemony!" the Baudelaires heard a voice call. "Are they here?"

"Indeed, they are," Lemony replied as he led the Baudelaires out of the underground hallway and into the VFD headquarters.

The headquarters looked exactly like the one that the Baudelaires encountered in the Valley of Four Drafts, only this was perfectly intact. The kitchen was very spacious and filled with all the necessary tools for cooking, which looked particularly pleasing to Sunny. There was a library filled with thousands upon thousands of books, something Klaus had long forgotten. Over the library was an archway inscribed with some very familiar dialect. It said, "The World is Quiet Here," something the Baudelaires were glad to see. There was an inventing studio filled with trinkets and gadgets, levers and pulleys, blueprints and computers, which Violet Baudelaire was happy to see. It had many more rooms inside, but what was already there amazed the Baudelaires. Up on the mountains, they had thought that they would never see the headquarters in all its glory, and yet, here it was, right in front of their eyes.

"Wow," they breathed. It was amazing.

"Baudelaires," said Lemony, "We are happy to have you here with us. They are a few people who would like to see you," he said and moved aside. To Violet's amazement, standing there behind him was a young man she cared very much about: Quigley Quagmire.

"Quigley!" she cried, and ran to him. He embraced her tightly, and tears came to Violet's eyes.

"Violet," he whispered. He looked right at her, and right there, in front of all those people, he kissed her lips. Violet smiled, and kissed him back.

"I love you," she whispered.

"I love you too," he whispered back. But then, the best moment of all came. Out of the inventing studio emerged a person they thought they would never see again. Standing there, in front of their eyes, was their mother.

"Mother," Violet whispered. She thought she was dreaming.

"Mom," Klaus said, thinking she was a hallucination.

"Mama," Sunny shrieked, and at the same moment, all three ran to their mother, crying and laughing at the same time. They hugged each other fiercely, weeping uncontrollably, feeling safe and happy once again. The Baudelaires held on to their mother tight, and they knew it was all going to be all right. They had not done everything in vain; they had had a purpose. Because their mother was alive, and that's all they needed for the rest of lives. They were a family again.


	6. A Real Happy Ending?

* * *

Chapter 6: A Real Happy Ending

Oh, wait, sorry. My mistake. Scratch that.

Chapter 6:_Almost_ a Real Happy Ending

The Baudelaires fidgeted in their seats as they waited to arrive at a place they had not been to in a long time. It was a place that they had only imagined in their wildest dreams, a place they had been to long ago. It was their home, the one that was burned down. Mrs. Baudelaire had hired an architect to re-build the house, and an interior designer to furnish the home just as it had been. Sunny was sitting on her mother's lap, and Violet and Klaus on either side of her. The taxi was driving quickly down the road, an order given by Mrs. Baudelaire.

"Good news, mother," Violet said reading a letter she had received upon leaving the VFD Plackford. "Count Olaf and his troupe members were captured, and they have been put to death," Violet said. Although death is never a very happy occasion, it is when an evil villain that has been pursuing you for your money after starting a fire that killed your family and destroyed your home.

"That's wonderful, darling," Mrs. Baudelaire said. "I am so very happy to see you three again! I missed helping you with your inventions, Violet, and reading with you Klaus. As for you my darling Sunny," she said as she tickled the little Baudelaire, "I will have to start giving you proper cooking lessons. You're not a baby anymore, now are you?"

"Good! Me cook with Mama!" she shrieked, and all the Baudelaires laughed.

"It's fantastic that the Quagmires are getting adopted and will be moving in next to us! I did so miss them. And I missed you, mother," Violet said. "I should like to get to know the family that is adopting them. I hear they already have a daughter. Imagine four children! Her name is Bethany, right?" she asked Klaus.

"Right," he said. "She is thirteen, my age," Klaus said. "Good thing that VFD was able to make the hot air balloon come down. I was quite fond of the Quagmire triplets."

"As was I," Violet said. All three Baudelaires could scarcely believe that they would have their old lives back, to live content and happy. They smiled through the whole car trip, and gasped when they saw their house, just as it was before the fire.

"It's beautiful," Violet said as the car came to a halt. She jumped out of the car, followed by her siblings and her mother. The sun was setting nicely, making the sky pink and red. It had been one year and eight months to the day since the fire, and all their memories of their previous light came flooding back. Violet walked to the door, and bracing herself, turned the handle on the door and opened it.

The air smelt familiar, the smell it had always had. The sunlight came through the window and hit Violet's face as she walked in, and suddenly, she felt relieved. It was all over. She would live with her mother and her siblings and her darling Quigley in happiness, never again to worry about Olaf and his troupe members, about their fortune. Yes, their father was dead, and they missed him, but they felt complete again. Violet smiled. They were finally home for good.


	7. A New Life

Chapter Seven: A New Life

Over the numerous years that I have worked for VFD, I have always wished for one thing, the thing I wanted most in life. Before I began working for VFD, and my husband, Jacques, was still alive, I lived in a large and beautiful home on the coast in Italy. My husband and I enjoyed a luxurious life with everything we wanted and more. We took walks on the beach, shopped at the market, and entertained hundreds of friends at large parties nearly every week. We learned how to fluently speak the romantic language of Italian so that we could converse with the townspeople and our neighbors. But then, a horrible event happened that forever changed our lives for the worst. I am sure that you know what horrible tragedy I speak of as I sit here in the dark confinement of my jail cell. I speak of a fire, a horrible fire that was started by an evil villain with an evil plan and an evil intention. My home was destroyed completely, from the spacious library to the cozy kitchen that I prepared meals in. Devastated, we were forced to move America. We lived in a small, crowded, foul-smelling apartment that we could barely afford with four other people. My husband worked at a factory on Lousy Lane, and I stayed at our filthy, inappropriate home, cooking and cleaning to earn my keep. It was in this miserable period of our lives that we learned about VFD, and we immediately joined, trying to prevent others from experiencing the same catastrophe that destroyed our lives. We worked with VFD many years. I specialized in training new recruits and helping them develop their unique skills that VFD so highly valued. But then, when Jacques died, I was unsure of what to do, so I stayed with my brother-in-law, Lemony, until I heard of the Volunteer Fire Damage team. This organization of noble people worked together to repair the things that numerous families across the nation lost due to a fire, including destroyed homes. I signed up at once, and my first project was rebuilding the Baudelaire mansion. In my brief time with this group of people, however, never once did I see my home on the list of things we would repair. All my life since the fire, I wished that I could go back to my glamorous life with my deceased husband, and forget about all the hardships that we encountered. The Baudelaires, however, were far more fortunate than I, for they received just what I have longed for the past ten years.

If you are someone who likes to jump ahead of the story, than you may guess that the Baudelaires lead a luxurious and glamorous life with their mother in their large mansion, and I have told you so, so it would be acceptable to think this, but I have lied to you, I am sorry to say. And I am equally sorry to say that your prediction is incorrect. The book you are holding in your hands, I am reluctant to say, is very unpleasant. If you like stories with happy endings, than you would be better off reading some other book, because not only is there no happy ending, but very few happy things in the middle, and this, I am sorry to tell you, is entirely correct.

Violet shuffled down the hallway groggily and half-asleep. She had smelled a fresh cup of coffee, and was immediately eager for a cup. She was going to awaken her siblings, for she was very eager to see them as well. It had been their first night in their newly rebuilt home, and she was curious to know how her siblings slept.

"Klaus?" she whispered, rapping on his bedroom door with her knuckles. After hearing no answer, she slowly opened the door and went inside.

Her brother was buried under dark blue covers, so Violet could not see his face. "Klaus?" she whispered again, and her brother stirred slightly from his deep and peaceful sleep. "Wake up."

"What time is it?" asked a muffled voice from inside the bed.

"Nine o'clock," Violet answered. "Mother's awake. Don't you want breakfast?"

"Yeah. Is Sunny up?" Klaus asked, pulling the covers off his face, and squinting in the morning light.

"I'm not sure, but we should let her sleep. She still needs more sleep than we do," Violet said.

"Probably," Klaus said, pulling himself out of bed. "Is that…" he began, "coffee?"

"Yes," Violet smiled and breathed in deeply. "I haven't had a cup of coffee for a long time."

"I didn't know you drank coffee," Klaus said.

"Father and I used to wake up early before school and have coffee with the morning paper. But that was a long time ago," Violet said sadly. "I only wish that our father had survived too," she said finally.

"I miss him too, Violet," Klaus said sympathetically. "But we have mother, and our home back! I don't know about you, but I couldn't be happier," Klaus smiled.

"I suppose you're right. You usually are," Violet said. "Come on, let's go downstairs," Violet gestured. "I'm famished," she commented, using a fancy word for "extremely hungry."

"Sure. You go ahead. I'll be down in a minute," Klaus said.

"All right," Violet agreed. "Check if Sunny's asleep, and if she is, don't wake her up." Klaus nodded, and Violet left his room and walked to the stairs.

By now, the smell of coffee was so appealing that Violet was tempted to slide down the shiny wood banister on the grand staircase in order to get to the kitchen faster. But, she was also very tired, so she decided to walk down the steps instead, such as most people do, assuming they are not attempting to escape from an evil fire started by an evil villain with one eyebrow and filthy grooming habits, in which case, sliding down the banister could be excused.

Violet gripped the banister and slowly began down the stairs, her nightdress trailing behind her. As she climbed down the steps, she began to take note of all the details of the grand entryway, of which she was approaching. The floor was a blinding gold, imprinted with designs of unrecognizable objects that vaguely copied the shapes of flowers. On the curved ceiling was a beautiful crystal chandelier that and sparkled in the light coming from the massive window by the front door.

Violet smiled and closed her eyes, remembering the large parties that her family used to throw. The entryway would be swarming with elegant ladies wearing silk and pearls, and gentlemen dressed up smartly in suits and ties. There would be music and dancing, eating and drinking, at which point the Baudelaires were sent to bed.

"Violet?" she heard someone call. It was her mother, and she sounded worried. Violet began running down the stairs, imagining all sorts of horrible things that could be going wrong. A fire, she thought, a robber, Count Olaf, even though he was dead.

"Mother, what is it?" Violet asked upon rushing into the kitchen. She saw nothing out of the ordinary, just her mother standing by the pantry with a can of peaches in one hand and a can opener in the other.

"You look so worried," Mrs. Baudelaire laughed. "What's gotten into you, Violet?"

"I heard you call me, and you sounded worried. Is everything all right?" Violet breathed.

"Yes. Is Sunny awake?" Mrs. Baudelaire asked, and Violet immediately knew what the problem was.

"Is the can opener broken?" Violet asked with a smile on her face.

"Yes," Mrs. Baudelaire said, her cheeks turning red. "Sunny's still asleep, huh? Would you mind fixing it for me?" she said, holding out the can opener.

"Of course I wouldn't. Actually, I'd love to. It's been a long time since I wasn't fixing something to get us out of a desperate situation," Violet smiled and took the can opener from her mother. She disappeared into the living room and tinkered and twisted, pulled and pushed, until the can opener was back to its former glory.

Glowing with a feeling of happiness and triumph, she made her way back to the kitchen, remembering the times that she had fixed things for her family, before the fire.

"Finished," Violet announced proudly, handing the device to her mother, who smiled at Violet gratefully.

"Thank you, darling," Mrs. Baudelaire said. "Would you get your brother and sister? Breakfast is waiting."

"Of course, Mother," Violet said, and left the kitchen to once again climb the large flight of stairs. As she went up, she collided with her brother who was making his way down the stairs.

"What was wrong?" Klaus asked. "I heard Mom calling you."

"The can opener was broken," Violet said as she walked up some more steps, and even though he could not see her face, Klaus was almost positive that Violet was smiling.

Violet continued her way upstairs, and Klaus downstairs. Violet went to Sunny's room and opened the door.

"Violet?" Sunny whispered.

"Sunny, time for breakfast. How long have you been awake?" Violet inquired as she led the smallest Baudelaire out of her room.

"Just now," Sunny said. "Smell food."

"Mother's preparing breakfast for us, just like she used to," Violet smiled as they made their way towards the kitchen.

When the sisters reached the kitchen the whole family sat down for a delicious breakfast that their mother had prepared and talked comfortably while they ate their breakfast, and then prepared themselves for a super fantastical, extra magical, sunny, wonderful day.

I wish that I could write paragraphs like this more often instead of paragraphs in which horrible events happen to small, innocent children, but alas, it is not so. To spare yourself of the gruesome details that make up this miserable and woeful book, I suggest that you shut this book right now and do something else. I am one hundred percent positive that you have at least one other thing that you could do instead of reading on until you are weeping uncontrollably. So my advice to you is this: go do that something else before you regret picking up this book! Once again, I must apologize for publishing this book, but you and I both know that I am not doing this for my own amusement, but rather for a very angry and extremely demanding publisher who likes to wear a red fez.

So, as you read (which by no means am I encouraging you to) through the upcoming pages of this unfortunate bundle of pages, keep in mind that this lovely and enjoyable life that the Baudelaires are living will not last, and very soon, you shall find yourself weeping again, as I am doing at this very moment.

It was already noon, and the Baudelaires so far had had a pleasurable and enjoyable morning in the comfort of their long lost home. Klaus had spent the majority of his time in the library, which was already filled with hundreds of books. Violet had worked in the shed in the yard, coming up with an invention that could provide necessary oxygen in the event of a fire. And Sunny had bitten on a few of the armrests in the house, and then had made a snack for all the Baudelaires to enjoy as they did what they loved best.

The children were now sitting on the sofa in the family room, listening to Violet.

"I think that we should visit the Quagmires, help them unpack. They would have come over to help us," Violet said to her siblings eagerly.

"Of course. The Quagmires were very kind to us when we were at Prufrock prep. We should return their courtesy," Klaus smiled at his sisters.

"Yes. Ask mama first, though!" Sunny pointed out, and her siblings nodded in agreement.

They left their place in the living room to produce their idea to Mrs. Baudelaire.

"Well, of course, darlings! That's very kind of you," Mrs. Baudelaire replied after the children had told her their plan. "Go along now," she said and gently nudged them out the door.

"Was Mother acting a little strange?" Klaus asked. "Or was it just me?"

"No, I heard the strain in her voice. She sounded eager to get us out of the house," Violet commented and shook her head. "It was probably nothing," she said finally, and dismissed it with a wave of her hand. Although, I must tell you, that she, unfortunately, was once again misled, for indeed, it was something, and not only just something, but a very significant something that the Baudelaires would later learn, and again, unfortunately, learn it too late.

The Baudelaires walked along the sidewalk until they reached a small house with a red door and big, clear windows with red curtains.

"Are you sure that this is it?" Klaus asked Violet.

"This is the address that Quigley gave me. This should be it," Violet answered, glancing at the scrap of paper that Quigley had given her with his address on it.

"There's only one way to find out," Klaus said and walked up the steps and onto the porch. He pulled the knocker on the red door, and the children heard footsteps as someone descended the steps. The red door opened to reveal a short, plump woman with her hair piled in a bun. She was wearing a bright red jacket over a pair of red pants, sitting nicely on top of red shoes.

"Yes? Can I help you?" the woman asked with a very proper British accent and a high-pitched voice, adjusting her glasses with red frames.

"Yes. I am Violet Baudelaire, and this is my brother Klaus and my sister Sunny. We're looking for the Quagmire triplets. Do they live here?" Violet inquired.

"Yes! Yes! Oh, hello! Please, don't stand outside! Come in, come in!" and the woman ushered the children inside.

The room was very small, yet comfortable, and it looked lived-in. The sofas were covered in bright red upholstery, next to a clear vase with red roses in it, set atop a red side table. The rug on the floor was burgundy, a word which here means, "yet another shade of red," and covered with the pattern of orange flowers.

"Welcome, Baudelaires! I'm Susana, the Quagmires' new official guardian! Please excuse my chatter, but I am so very excited to see you! Before I took the triplets in, we exchanged letters, and all they spoke of was you! I feel honored to meet you, finally! I feel like I need to sign an autograph, because I've finally met the Baudelaires!" she blurt out.

The Baudelaires smiled at each other uncomfortably, but at the same time, were grateful for Susana's friendliness. It was apparent to them that Susana was a social butterfly, and they assumed that her favorite color was red. Everything was red, down to the very last candlestick, save one lonely brown table that looked awkwardly out of place in the bright room.

"Pleasure to meet you," Violet said politely once the children had surveyed the room.

"How do you do?" Klaus asked.

"Nice meet," Sunny said.

"I am fine, but you're not here for me! I'll get the children! In the meantime, please, make yourself at home," she said, and led them to the living room, and then rushed up the steps with the red carpet.

The Baudelaires sat in silence, staring at all the red until their eyes hungered for another color. They sat for a few minutes until they heard someone slowly coming down the steps.

"Hello," they heard a deep, rich voice say. It was a female voice, but it was not Susana. The Baudelaires turned their heads to see a girl who looked Klaus' age standing on the last step. She had long, thick, and wavy gold-brown hair, olive skin, and beautiful chocolate eyes with long, black eyelashes. She was wearing a black dress that reached the floor, and underneath she was wearing black boots. "I am Bethany. I presume you are the Baudelaires?" she asked as she walked towards them.

"Yes," Klaus said standing up. Bethany was about four inches shorter than he was, so he had to look slightly to see her. "I'm Klaus. Pleased to meet you," he said as he shook her hand. Her grip was firm, but not too hard. "Are you Susana's daughter?"

"I am," she said, looking straight at Klaus' eyes as long as she dared, but then averted them to his sisters behind him.

"I'm Violet," the eldest Baudelaire said when she saw Bethany looking at her. There was something about Bethany's eyes that seemed different. They seemed serious and bold, but at the same time, soft and kind. They were the biggest eyes that the Baudelaires had ever seen, and they tried hard not to stare at them.

"Sunny," the young girl said after a long pause.

"I must apologize for my mother's chatter. I'm afraid her mouth has run away with her again," Bethany said.

"It's all right. She seemed very friendly," Violet said as the four children sat down, the Baudelaires and Bethany facing each other.

"Yes, well, some people find it offensive to speak so freely, but I am used to it. After all, she is my mother," Bethany said. The Baudelaires noticed that she had not smiled once yet, making her seem even more reserved and composed. She stared openly at all three of them, apparently not afraid that she would come across as rude, though the Baudelaires did not find her rude, but rather, intoxicating, particularly Klaus.

"Have we met before?" Klaus asked after a moment.

At last, Bethany gave a small smile. "I was hoping that you would remember," she said. "It was before the fire. We went to school together, and were in the same class, though you didn't seem to take note of me." Klaus wondered how on earth he would not notice someone like Bethany. "Except once," she commented, correcting herself. "Do you remember Jonathan Smythe?" she asked.

"Yes," Klaus answered. "He was quite a bully." Bethany nodded her head.

"He was teasing me, and you told him to stop. I never got a chance to thank you, so I shall say it now. Thank you," Bethany smiled gratefully.

"I remember now!" Klaus said. "We were nine, weren't we?" he asked.

"Yes," Bethany answered, glancing in the direction of the stairs. "What is taking my mother so long?" she said to herself, and then glanced back at the Baudelaires, though her gaze lingered upon Klaus.

Just then, they heard what sounded like a herd of elephants trampling down the stairs, accompanied by three mice. The first one down the stairs was Susana, apparently the herd of elephants. After came Duncan, Isadora, and then last, Quigley, or rather the mice.

"I'll put on some tea!" Susana exclaimed, and disappeared into the kitchen.

"Klaus! Violet! Sunny!" Isadora cried, and rushed to embrace them. Bethany observed from a distance, her eyes fixed upon Isadora, who was hugging Klaus now.

"We missed you!" Duncan said and rushed behind his sister.

"Hello," Quigley said to Violet as her cheeks turned red.

"We came to help," Violet said. "Is there anything that we can do? You were so kind to us at Prufrock prep, and we'd like to repay you."

"That's not necessary. You saved our lives, Baudelaires. That's payment enough," Isadora smiled at Violet.

"Whatever happened to Hector?" Klaus asked, referring to the man that Duncan and Isadora had lived with in the self-sustaining hot air balloon briefly.

"He went back home, and finally got the courage to stand up to the Council of Elders," Duncan said. The Council of Elders was a group of people that created ridiculous crow-related rules, and had made Hector quite skittish and standoffish.

"Good for him," Sunny said. "Was too afraid."

"Yes. We're really happy that you're here," Quigley said.

Bethany had been silent all this time, sitting on the red sofa just listening to the conversation. She had no idea what they were speaking of, so she felt inclined to be silent. Klaus glanced her way and saw that her big eyes were fixed upon him, and she looked angered. He followed her gaze towards Isadora, and he saw the connection. Bethany was jealous of Isadora, and Isadora knew it. The Baudelaires saw Isadora quickly glare at Bethany, and Bethany's big eyes became sad. Not the kind of sad like my-puppy-ran-away sad, but a deeper sadness. She was disappointed, and sorrowful that it had to be like that between her and Isadora. Bethany clearly was upset, but she looked willing to forgive. Bethany then saw Klaus looking at her, and she gave him a small smile as if to say, "It's not your fault," and Klaus nodded his head in understanding.

Quigley, sensing that something was wrong, quickly suggested that they go to the kitchen and help Susana with the tea, kindly inviting Bethany along.

"Good idea," Violet said, seeing what Quigley was up to. "Bethany, come with us! We don't want to leave you out."

"All right," she said quietly, all the strength and power in her voice gone. Violet purposely tagged behind with Bethany so that she could have a word with her.

"Is something wrong?" Violet whispered to Bethany as her friends and her siblings chatted in front of her.

"Yes," she said outright. Violet was taken aback, expecting Bethany to deny it or say that it was nothing. "Isadora does not like me."

"Why not? You two are practically sisters," Violet said.

"I know. But we're different. She's energetic and talkative, but I am more restrained and, I don't know, serious, I suppose," Bethany said sadly. "We've just found something else to disagree upon, and that's not going to make it better."

Violet nodded, knowing what Bethany spoke of. "Everyone disagrees sometimes. I understand that you and Isadora are different, and that makes it hard. You have to learn to get along," Violet said as they pushed open the door to the monochromatic kitchen, a word which here means, "A room with a color scheme consisting of one color, most likely red."

"It's hard," Bethany protested.

"I know. But one thing that's going to make it easier is your friendship with Klaus. You must remain friends, and nothing more," Violet said.

"I understand," Bethany said, nodding her head solemnly.

"Children!" Susana exclaimed. "Can you do me a favor? I need help unpacking all these boxes," she said, gesturing towards a mountain of brown containers. "I'm afraid I haven't gotten around to it, and I could use some good young people to help me," she admitted.

"Of course," the children replied, and got to work.

For the rest of the afternoon, the children unpacked and talked about everything that had happened since they last saw each other. They enjoyed delicious peach tea and cucumber sandwiches, a tradition in England. Bethany left early to finish her regular chores, and excuse to get away from Isadora. But, finally, when every last box had been opened and its contents safely stored away, the children said goodbye and thanked Susana for the meal, and then the Baudelaires headed home in the darkness of night.

"Susana is very sweet," Violet commented. "She talks a lot, but she's very thoughtful," she said as they walked down the street back to their home.

"Yes. It's so nice to see the Quagmires again," Klaus said, and then was silent for a moment. "There's something about Bethany."

"I agree. She lives with, this, this, conviction," Violet said, finally choosing the word, "that I could never understand."

"Conviction?" Sunny asked.

"'Conviction' in this case," Klaus explained, "means 'very strong belief in everything a person considers as true.' A person who lives with conviction believes very strongly in whatever they believe in. They are never uncertain of what they say and stand for, never only half-believe what they say. It's a very rare, but admirable, character trait. And yes, Violet I agree, though she did not really say what she believed in. But you can tell by just looking at her."

"Her eyes," Violet said, "they seem to… I don't know. I can't explain it. They seem like they have a life of their own. Everything that she feels, you can just see it in her eyes."

"It's very strange," Klaus said. "Bethany seems wise beyond her years, I suppose. Like an adult was placed inside a child's body."

"Exactly," Violet said. "Look," she said suddenly as they approached their house. "All the lights are off," she noted as she pointed to the windows.

"That's odd. Maybe Mom's decided to conserve energy," Klaus suggested.

"I don't know," Violet said uneasily. "Mother is very practical. She would never turn all the lights off."

"Bad," Sunny said.

"Yeah," Violet said. "I have a bad feeling about this," she said as she slowly opened their front door and cautiously stepped into the dark entry room.

"Mother?" Violet called as she watched her footing, careful not to trip over any unseen object on the floor, though the Baudelaires were generally tidy people. No answer.

"Mom?" Klaus asked the darkness, carefully following his older sister.

"Mama?" Sunny called out from her brother's arms.

"This can't be good," Violet said.

"You're absolutely correct," a cold, wheezy voice called from the darkness. Violet screamed as an unknown bony hand seized her shoulder, and this is the part where it gets very bad indeed.


	8. A Villain, a Fortune, and a Friend

Chapter Eight: A Villain, a Fortune, and a Friend

I have told you countless amounts of times that this is an unfortunate book. I have said it in the beginning, in the middle, and at least ten times since the halfway point. If before this chapter you thought, "Oh, it's not that bad. Lisle is exaggerating," then I am sure that you no longer think that. Because, for an unknown, scary voice to be in your dark house and tell you that you are in very bad situation is an event that is completely terrifying and it makes me want to sleep with ten nightlights, and that is not exaggerated at all. If you still doubt the unfortunate contents of this book, then you must imagine yourself in the situation that the three Baudelaires were being faced with this very moment, and then I can guarantee that you will no longer think these, "the author is crazy" type of thoughts.

The hand grabbed all three of the children, despite their screams and kicks. It dragged them to the front door and opened it, letting in the moonlight.

"Let go!" Violet screamed as soon as she had a free moment. She looked up to see her captor's face, and what she saw ran chills up her spine and her blood ran cold.

It was a man. He had one eyebrow instead of two, squinty eyes, foul breath, and dirty fingernails. His suit was covered with pictures of eyes, and when Violet looked at his feet, she could see he wasn't wearing any socks with his shoes. He boot was partly unzipped, and Violet could see a tattoo that had haunted her in her nightmares ever since she met Count Olaf. It was an eye, the insignia of VFD.

Though this man looked very much like Count Olaf, he was not Count Olaf, for if you recall, Count Olaf was dead, thank heaven. But this man was probably even more terrifying, and his name was Omar, Sir Omar to be exact. This terrible and horrifying man was the dastardly older brother of Count Olaf. And to answer your question, no, I do not know what his parents were thinking. This man has haunted me since that day by Lake Lachrymose when I was forced to disguise as a street vendor selling olives, handing out secret envelopes to those who knew the code, but that will be another book. For the moment, I suppose that you are eager to see what will happen next, assuming, of course, that you are immune to tears.

Omar (and I will call him this though the Baudelaires do not know who it is yet) threatened the children to be silent and covered their mouths with his long bony hands. He walked the children outside the house and down the driveway where a small delivery truck was parked and waiting.

"Say goodbye to your lovely home, orphans!" Sir Omar said and opened the back of the truck. With a wicked smile of triumph on his face, he shoved the Baudelaires in the back of the truck filled with metal boxes and shut the doors. The Baudelaires found themselves in the midst of unfathomable darkness yet again.

The car rumbled as Omar started the truck and sped off into the night. The Baudelaires' throats were too sore to scream any more, so they were silent. They reached out for each other in the cold dark, just to make sure that everyone was there.

"Klaus," Violet finally ventured. "Listen." The Baudelaires were as quite and still as a grave as they strained their ears. They heard a slow, rasping sound. It sounded like someone was struggling to breathe, but it wasn't a Baudelaire.

"Hello?" Klaus softly called out, but heard no reply. The Baudelaires moved in the direction of the sound, and gasped when they saw who had been making the noise.

On the wall, there was a small hole that let in air and light so that the Baudelaires could see. On the floor of the truck was the shape of someone sitting up. The Baudelaires saw that it was a girl, her gold-brown hair covering her face. Her head was in her arms, so she did not notice the Baudelaires. She was dressed in a white nightdress, as if she had been going to sleep. Her skin was olive and dark, and when the Baudelaires had looked at her for a while, it struck them who this girl was.

"Bethany!" Klaus cried as loud as he dared. He gently touched her shoulder, and Bethany slowly looked up. Her chocolate eyes looked up at the Baudelaires too, and they were angry. "Are you okay?"

"Klaus?" she whispered. "What are you doing here?"

"We were kidnapped, Bethany," Klaus said urgently.

"We don't know why," Violet added.

"So was I, and I don't either," Bethany said in her deep voice as she sat up straighter.

"What will happen to us?" Klaus asked. "Who is this man? What does he want from us?"

"He looks like Count Olaf," Violet whispered. "He even had the tattoo," and everyone knew what she was referring to.

"We'll be fine," Bethany said confidently. "We have to find a way to get out of here," she ordered as the van made a sharp turn around a corner. "And fast," she added urgently.

"Violet, can you invent something to get us out of here?" Klaus asked.

"How? There's nothing in here, and we can hardly see anything," Violet moaned.

"There's always something," Bethany said and stood up from her spot on the floor. The ceiling was taller than Violet, so she did not have to crouch. Careful and unsteadily, she walked around in the dark, feeling the walls with her fingers. She frowned in the dark, not sure of what she was looking for until her shoe brushed up against something. She bent over to pick it up, and saw that it was piece of metal that looked like a stick. One edge was sharp and jagged, broken off something, and the other end was smooth and sturdy. "And I do believe I found it," Bethany smiled.

"What it is?" Klaus asked as Bethany made her way back to the others.

"It's a strip of metal that's been broken off something. It looks somewhat like a crowbar," Bethany observed, handing it to Violet.

"Perfect," Violet said. "If we could somehow wedge this between the doors, we could force them open."

"How do we do that?" Bethany questioned. "The doors are locked and shut tight."

"I'll figure it out," Violet said much more confidently than she felt. "It'll work."

"But once we have the doors open, then what? The vehicle is traveling much to fast to jump out, and the man might notice us before we get a chance to do anything," Klaus pointed out.

"We've got to try. Who knows what will happen if we don't?" Violet asked. She stood up and crossed over to the big doors, practically falling over when the car started speeding up. Carefully, she took the jagged end of the ersatz crowbar and placed the tip on the crack in between the two doors. Slowly, she began to twist it, pushing it a little bit as she did. The tip was already in the crack, and it was going in further. It got harder as the doors started to open a little bit, until finally, the crowbar was in between the doors, letting in a rush of cool air in the crack. Now would come the hard part. "I need help," she said. "The doors are too heavy to do this alone." The others rushed to her side, Sunny standing by because she was too small to use a sharp crowbar.

"All right," Violet said. "Here's how this is going to work. Only one of these doors can open at a time, so we need to do the one with the lock first. We need to push the end closest to us at an angle. The other end will push the door towards us, and it'll open. When I say, okay?" Violet said. "Okay, push!" she said. Klaus and Bethany did as Violet told them, and pushed with all their might upon the heavy door.

"It's working!" Bethany cried as the door began to creek open.

"Keep going!" Violet said. The door was swinging in towards them, almost to the point of opening. Then, all at once, the lock broke off and the door swung inside the truck, almost hitting Bethany as it did so.

"Hey!" they could hear the man driving the truck call. He slammed on the breaks, sliding the car sideways. The Baudelaires and Bethany hung on for their lives, careful not to fall out the door as the car swerved around. It was balancing on two wheels now, so that the Baudelaires and Bethany were turned upside down. But just when they thought it was over, something terrible happened. The truck collided with an oncoming car, and it went spinning. The Baudelaires screamed as they tumbled through the air inside the back of the truck. The truck tumbled down the hill that the street had been built upon, a horrible end for the children. Violet kept Sunny under her so that the young girl would not be hurt, but the older children were in a great deal of danger. Bethany's hands slipped from the door handle, and the girl fell out of the spinning truck and went tumbling on the ground and down the hill.

"Bethany!" Klaus managed to cry just as Bethany stopped rolling and landed in a shallow stream at the bottom of the valley. She tried to lift herself up, but fell back down again. She didn't move.

All at once, the automobile landed in the shallow stream alongside Bethany, and the noise and the tumbling stopped. Klaus had a large cut on his forehead, a very lucky child indeed. Violet was bruised and had many small cuts on her arms from the shattering glass of the windows that had cracked in all the commotion. Sunny was uninjured, but still very frightened, as were her siblings.

Klaus, dizzy from the rough trip, slowly stood up and went to his sisters. He helped Violet to stand so she could scoop up Sunny in her arms. The Baudelaires were very lucky children indeed.

"Bethany," Klaus suddenly remembered. He climbed out of the wreckage as best as he could, stepping in the muddy stream. It reached his knees. He realized with horror that Bethany would be underwater and out of oxygen, and ran as fast as he could towards her.

He saw a white, ghostly figure at the bottom of the stream, brown hair flowing out and rippling. Her white dress billowed out, making her look like an angel. It was Bethany, her big eyes closed, her chest still. She wasn't breathing. Klaus grabbed her and lifted her out of the water just as his sisters emerged from the truck. He dragged her out of the stream and onto the muddy shore. Her eyelashes were wet with tiny drops of clear water, sparkling in the moonlight. She still did not stir.

"Violet!" Klaus called. "She isn't breathing!" and his sisters rushed to his side.

"Don't panic," Violet said. "We can still save her. Klaus, please try to remember something from a book you've read! We can't give up!" she cried, as Klaus thought as hard as he could in order to save his friend's life. He thought and thought until he remembered something.

"I read somewhere that she has to have a forced intake of carbon dioxide! The only way to do that is to breathe into her mouth!" Klaus cried.

"Then do it!" Violet hissed at him. "Hurry!" she urged.

Klaus braced himself, then did as his sister said. Bethany's eyes suddenly opened, and Klaus pulled away. Bethany hacked roughly and gasped for air. Klaus helped her sit up, thankful she was alive.

"Klaus," she said, and suddenly, wrapped her arms around him tightly in an embrace. Klaus hugged her back. "You saved my life," she said as she pulled away from him. Klaus could see in the dim light that her big eyes were filled with tears, a wide smile on her face.

"You're okay," he said. "Are you hurt?" he asked, and Bethany shook her head as she glanced at the cloudy sky.

"We were so worried," Violet said, just as they heard thunder crash. It started to rain, suddenly, and hard.

"We need to find shelter!" Bethany said. As luck would have it, Violet spotted something on the side of the cliff wall. It was a hole, and it appeared to be a cave about ten feet above the ground.

"How about that?" Violet said.

"It's better than nothing," Klaus said as he helped Bethany stand up. The Baudelaires and Bethany rushed to the hole to see that it was a small cave about eight feet deep. It was good enough, and they decided to take their chances and go inside.

"Grab on to these rocks and climb up," Bethany said and reached up. She pulled herself up and climbed bravely to the top quickly. The Baudelaires exchanged smiles at her boldness despite the fact she had just fallen out of a fast moving vehicle and was unconscious for a short period of time.

The children followed, first Violet, and then Klaus, who held Sunny in one arm. They reached the top alongside Bethany and climbed inside.

"It doesn't look like this rain is going to let up anytime soon," Bethany said. "We might as well sleep for the time-being," she commented, and the Baudelaires nodded in agreement.

They settled themselves at the far end of the cave and closed their eyes, drifting into a light and troubled sleep. They did not know what would happen next.


	9. The Other Villain

Chapter Nine: The Other Villain

Klaus woke up to see Bethany at the opening of the cave, staring at the dark sky. He rose from his uncomfortable spot on the ground and slowly approached the girl. He sat down next to her, Bethany's eyes still on the stars.

"What are you doing?" Klaus asked the girl.

"I'm just…" she started, "thinking," she said finally.

"About what?" he asked gently.

"Everything and anything," she said and turned to him. "Thank you. For saving me, I mean."

"You're welcome," he answered. "You didn't expect me to?" he inquired.

"No, I did. I just…didn't think you cared about me," Bethany said slowly.

"Why?" he asked. "Of course I do." Bethany looked at him with those eyes, and Klaus knew what she meant. "Isadora," he whispered. "You though…Isadora and I…" he trailed off, and Bethany nodded.

"I was wrong, wasn't I?" she asked, and it was Klaus' turn to nod his head. Bethany looked back at the sky and smiled. "Do you believe in a higher power?" she asked him, and Klaus was taken aback.

"A higher power?" he repeated.

"A God," Bethany said. "An all-powerful God that created everything and everyone."

"I…don't know," he admitted. "I've heard that all my life, but I was never certain. It seems so far-fetched. Do you?" he asked.

"Yes," Bethany said. "I believe in God and Jesus Christ."

"Who?" Klaus asked.

"Jesus. He was God in the flesh, and he died for everyone's sins. He says if you truly believe with all your soul that he died to forgive you, you can be promised admission into heaven, and a relationship with God," Bethany said.

"You believe that?" Klaus asked.

"Every word of it," Bethany said. "Klaus, if you want to go someplace better after you die, to live and have a purpose, to fill that empty space in your life, then you can choose to believe in God and Jesus."

"I have always known, yet I never believed. I'm not sure. I have to think about it. It's a lot to take in. It can change your life!" Klaus said.

"Do consider it though," Bethany said and stared right into his eyes. "It's true," she said firmly. "All of it," she said, then her gaze softened. "I'm sorry," she said and turned away from him. "I hope I didn't make you uncomfortable."

"You didn't," he said. "It's fine," he said, and turned her so that she faced him. Their eyes met and locked for a long time, Bethany's eyes wide with curiosity.

"If you don't like Isadora," Bethany said finally, "than whom do you like?"

"You still don't know?" Klaus smiled, and Bethany shook her head. "You," he whispered, and Bethany smiled.

"I like you too," she said, and she leaned in close to him. She kissed him gently on the mouth, and Klaus kissed her back. When they pulled away from each other, they were both smiling. But then, Bethany suddenly looked alarmed, and she quickly stood up.

"What's wrong?" Klaus asked.

"I shouldn't have done that," she said gravely. "Isadora is my sister, and I betrayed her."

"I'm sorry," Klaus said quietly, his happiness melting away to guilt.

"No, that's not what I meant," Bethany said softly when she saw Klaus' face. She once again sat down next to him, her legs dangling over the side of the cave. "I like you, Klaus, a lot. More then anyone I've ever liked. And I liked the kiss. I've never been kissed before," she said. Her openness and trust surprised Klaus, and he realized that he liked the kiss too.

"Bethany," he said. "Isadora is your sister, and I know you feel like you've betrayed her, but I don't like her like that. I like her as a friend, but I like you than more than that. You didn't do anything wrong. Besides, I kissed you back," Klaus pointed out.

"Yes, but I kissed you first," Bethany said. "Well, I suppose you're right. You usually are," she smiled.

Klaus hugged her tightly, her small body pressed against him. She was very tiny, he realized. But for such a small person, she was the loudest voice in any crowd, and he respected her for that.

Bethany hugged Klaus back, feeling safe against his tall shape. He was taller than she was, at least four inches. She was only five feet two inches tall, so when she hugged Klaus, she always felt like she was much smaller than she actually was, but she liked the feeling.

"Klaus," she said once she had pulled away from the embrace. "I can't," she said.

"Why?" Klaus asked. "Don't worry about Isadora."

"You don't know everything. I have my reasons," she said firmly.

"What is it?" he asked.

"I can't tell you!" she whispered. "I can't tell you!" she repeated. "I wish I could, but I can't," she said as her eyes filled with tears. "I want to," she said. "Please understand."

Klaus didn't understand. "I don't," he said. "What's wrong, Bethany?"

She looked at him with those once happy eyes, now sad and scared. "I don't want to get my hopes up," she said finally.

"What do you mean?" he tried again.

"I don't want to get my hopes up, because…" she trailed off. "I might not…be here that long."

"Bethany," Klaus said. "Tell me, please. I'm worried about you."

"I might die," she said, shocking Klaus. "I have cancer, Klaus," she said.

Klaus closed his eyes, not believing what she was saying. "But, you're only thirteen," he protested.

"That doesn't count for anything. I've had since I was seven. I don't want to get my hopes up because I could die, Klaus. And then, I'd never see you again. I do not need a reason to be angry with God, but then, you happened, and everything changed. I can't do this. It's selfish, Klaus. I'm not fine! Don't you see? I could die!" Bethany said. She climbed over the edge of the ledge and ran and ran as far as she could. Klaus knew that she needed to be alone, and as much as it went against his better judgment, he let her go, thinking she would come back later. But—I am sorry to say—he was very, very wrong.


	10. The Frightful Finish

Chapter Ten: The Frightful Finish

Violet opened her eyes to a wet and cloudy morning. She had not slept most of the night, for the cold hard ground was uncomfortable, and she had been too worried to sleep anyhow. She sat up and yawned, yearning for her own bed. She shivered as a gust of wind blew through the cave, and she saw her siblings stir. Sunny was on the ground next to her, her tiny fingers curled in a fist, her eyes shut. Klaus was a couple feet away from her, also shivering in the chilly morning air.

Before I continue with this sad and woeful tale, I will stop and explain a few things. I am sure you are wondering where the story is going from here, but I can assure you that it has almost come to an end, so that you can finally stop weeping and promise yourself to never again touch a book with a title so woeful and miserable as "A Series of Unfortunate Events," as I wish I could have done. I am also sure you are wondering, "Why on earth would Bethany have tried to run away from her friends?" Let me tell you: Bethany has had leukemia, cancer of the blood cells, since she was a little girl. She had gone for treatments at the hospital, but she never got any better. She had known ever since she was diagnosed that no one could understand how she felt. She had also known that she wasn't supposed to tell anyone, lest they treat her differently from normal, healthy people. But because she had revealed her secret, guilt weighed on her mind. She had also felt a strong sense of betrayal to Isadora, and this guilt also weighed on her mind. So when she felt so guilty, she could not bear to be around people like Violet, Klaus and Sunny. They would try to make her feel better. She did not wish to feel better, because she thought she deserved punishment for the things she had done wrong. Bethany was also embarrassed for revealing something that she hadn't told anyone in a long time, not even her new siblings. So, when you put all this together, you can come to the conclusion that Bethany felt overwhelmed.

As I have said before, Klaus assumption about her return was very wrong. But Violet did not even notice she was gone until a few minutes after she woke up. And when she did, she immediately panicked.

"Klaus, Sunny, wake up!" she said as she jumped up from her spot and shook her siblings.

"What wrong?" asked Sunny as she opened one eye to look at her sister.

"Bethany's missing," Violet said quickly. "Where could she have gone?"

Klaus suddenly realized what had happened. "She…" he began.

"She what, Klaus, she what?" Violet cried, growing impatient.

"She ran away," Klaus said finally. "I thought she'd come back…"

"You knew?" Violet asked. "No, no, never mind. This is no time to point fingers. We just have to find her," she said, sounding quite determined. "Are you sure you don't know where she went?"

"No," Klaus replied. How could he let her just run off like that? He was incredibly disappointed in himself for the first time. And as some of you know, that is not a very pleasant feeling.

This would be the perfect opportunity to remind you that the book you are holding in your hands is extremely unpleasant. It is filled with upsetting things and people, one of whom is Sir Omar, and places. Its contents include unfortunate situations that unfairly occur in the lives of three miserable children who feel as if the series of unfortunate events stringing together their lives will never end, just as I feel the misery, heartache, and woe stringing together my life shall never end. As I sit typing, tied to a chair in a room that is slowly filling up with grape juice, so that very soon I shall be drowned in the purple and sticky liquid, I advise you to immediately fling this book out the window and pray that some wild animal devours its woeful contents. Because, although you will be happy to know that this miserable volume of the account of the Baudelaires' lives is coming to an end, the last pages of this unhappy book will leaving you weeping and wishing that you had went to the movies instead of buying this horrible book. So, I shall give you one last warning before I speak of Bethany's fate and tell you to stop reading this book at once so that you shall be spared the gruesome details of my unfairly unfortunate and unfortunately unfair book!

"Well, we have to look anyway," Violet said and picked up her drowsy sister.

"She could be miles away by now," Klaus protested.

"Then we'll look for miles," Violet spat back. She breathed a heavy sigh as if to say, "It seems as if the unfortunate events stringing together our lives will never end."

"Why did Bethany run?" asked Sunny, who had been quietly listening to her siblings squabble over a young girl who, unknown to the Baudelaires, was not going to reappear for quite some time, due to an unfortunate circumstance involving the nasty brother of the late Count Olaf.

"I'm not sure," Klaus replied quickly. He was not about to reveal Bethany's secret to his sisters. "But, that doesn't matter. As long as we find her."

"Hello, hello, hello," a voice said in a wheezy whisper. "I am your beloved Sir Omar." The Baudelaires turned around to see the man standing in the entryway of the small cave.

"Sir who?" Violet asked.

"Omar," the man replied with detestation, a word which here means, "with disgust." "I am here to claim vengeance for my dear brother," –here the man paused to wipe a few dramatic tears from his eyes (acting seemed to run in the family)- "Count Olaf."

The children gasped. Was this man truly the brother of their worst enemy and the man responsible for all the heartache that made up the Baudelaires' lives?

"Count… Olaf?" Klaus questioned.

"Yes," Sir Omar said, growing impatient. "I thought you were supposed to be intelligent orphans."

"We're not orphans," Violet protested.

Sir Omar sneered. "But that, Baudelaires, is where you are wrong."

"Don't be absurd," Klaus said. "Our mother is alive. What have you done with Bethany?"

"Oh, I took care of her," Sir Omar snickered.

"If you've hurt her at all, why, I'll-" Klaus threatened.

"Don't worry," Sir Omar smiled. "She's perfectly safe…for now, any way." He threw back his head and cackled a blood-curdling laugh that sent shivers down the Baudelaires' spines.

"Where is Bethany?" Violet asked. "Tell us now!"

"You'll soon join her," Sir Omar said, and with that, seized the children and tied them up. Suddenly, with a hard blow, Violet's vision went black. That was the last thing she could remember.


End file.
